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News In Brief Archives
NFL season to climax today with Pro Bowl
HONOLULU, HI -- The 2008-09 NFL season will climax this afternoon with the annual playing of the Pro Bowl, the most highly anticipated wonderful afternoon of football in the whole [continue reading...]
Posted on February 8th, 2009
Todd Haley to interview with Chiefs about the possibility of yelling at their players
KANSAS CITY, MO -- The Arizona Cardinals have granted permission to the Kansas City Chiefs, who wish to interview Arizona offensive coordinator Todd Haley. "We think Todd could [continue reading...]
Posted on February 4th, 2009
Patriots coach Bill Belichick caught taping the Cardinals’ taping of the Steelers’ practice
TAMPA BAY -- New England Patriots coach Bill Belichick is facing a new suspension today after he was caught videotaping the Arizona Cardinals, who were taping the Pittsburgh [continue reading...]
Posted on January 29th, 2009
Polamalu thinking about buying a vowel
PITTSBURGH, PA -- Inspired by a recent rerun of Wheel of Fortune, Pittsburgh Steelers safety Troy Polamalu has announced that he has contacted host Pat Sajak in hopes of buying [continue reading...]
Posted on January 20th, 2009
ESPN discovers 28 other MLB squads
BRISTOL, CT -- With the help of a research team numbering in the hundreds, sports media giant ESPN made a startling discovery this weekend that, over time, could prove to [continue reading...]
Posted on December 21st, 2008
Stuart Scott’s wife refuses hug, hand-pound
BRISTOL, CT -- ESPN SportsCenter anchor Stuart Scott's wife had enough, apparently, refusing both a hug and a hand-pound when her husband returned from taping his show "Stump the Schwab" [continue reading...]
Posted on December 20th, 2008
ESPN discovers 28 other MLB squads
BRISTOL, CT -- With the help of a research team numbering in the hundreds, sports media giant ESPN made a startling discovery this weekend that, over time, could prove to [continue reading...]
Posted on December 20th, 2008
Mike Tyson opens mutual fund to save for future
BROOKLYN, N.Y.—Mike Tyson has opened a State Farm International Equity Fund Class B mutual fund account, and is depositing $50/month as he begins to build a savings for the future. [continue reading...]
Posted on December 15th, 2008
Regular def rendered ‘useless’ to Evanston native
EVANSTON, IL -- Local man Jason Rogers, who recently spent two weeks pet-sitting at the condominium of a wealthy friend, is now virtually unable to watch regular-definition television. "After living [continue reading...]
Posted on December 14th, 2008
Illini name new mascot
CHAMPAIGN, IL -- In a long-anticipated announcement, the University of Illinois sent controversial Chief Illiniwek packing to the reservation where, in the words of the colorful, feather-laden mascot, "the firewater [continue reading...]
Posted on December 13th, 2008
GroupWrite: Favre calls McCain, tells him how to beat Obama
SSNN is introducing a new feature in which we'll announce a headline and solicit input from our readers, that we'll put together into a story written by the readership. If [continue reading...]
Posted on November 2nd, 2008
GroupWrite: Lebron James taking election day off to get out the vote
SSNN is introducing a new feature in which we'll announce a headline and solicit input from our readers, that we'll put together into a story written by the readership. If [continue reading...]
Posted on November 1st, 2008
GroupWrite: Michael Vick to rehabilitate with Cowboys
SSNN is introducing a new feature in which we'll announce a headline and solicit input from our readers, that we'll put together into a story written by the readership. If [continue reading...]
Posted on October 31st, 2008
GroupWrite: Oden to dress up as NBA player for Halloween
SSNN is introducing a new feature in which we'll announce a headline and solicit input from our readers, that we'll put together into a story written by the readership. If [continue reading...]
Posted on October 30th, 2008
BREAKING NEWS: McCain admits he doesn’t know who Hamels is; election in jeopardy
SCRANTON, PA -- This afternoon, John McCain held a town-hall style event at a VFW here. These events are considered to be McCain's specialty, but today, McCain made a costly [continue reading...]
Posted on October 30th, 2008
Ryan Howard “totally hit two bombs in BP today”
PHILADELPHIA, PA -- Ryan Howard put on a show today at batting practice the day before the third game of the 2008 World Series, according to himself. "I totally launched two [continue reading...]
Posted on October 24th, 2008
Red Sox seek to be added to federal bailout
BOSTON -- Boston Red Sox owner John Henry announced today that he's very close to a deal with the U.S. Treasury in which the Boston Red Sox will be added [continue reading...]
Posted on October 15th, 2008
Joe Buck walking around telling people about the significance of mundane events
LOS ANGELES and PHILADELPHIA -- Fox baseball announcer Joe Buck, overtaken with excitement about the National League Championship Series, has taken to describing the immense importance of ordinary events to [continue reading...]
Posted on October 14th, 2008
Jeter preparing for October by buying tickets online
NEW YORK -- Derek Jeter is ready for October, the month that he normally spends very much involved with the MLB Playoffs. "This year, October is a little different for me," [continue reading...]
Posted on October 1st, 2008
Lane Kiffin changes Facebook relationship status to “It’s complicated with Al Davis”
OAKLAND, CA -- Lane Kiffin's 232 friends were treated Tuesday to an unexpected news alert Monday, as Kiffin changed his Facebook relationship status to "It's complicated with Al Davis." "I just [continue reading...]
Posted on September 30th, 2008
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News In Brief
- NFL season to climax today with Pro Bowl
- Todd Haley to interview with Chiefs about the possibility of yelling at their players
- Patriots coach Bill Belichick caught taping the Cardinals’ taping of the Steelers’ practice
- Polamalu thinking about buying a vowel
- ESPN discovers 28 other MLB squads
- Older News In Brief...
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