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Ron Jaworski Archives

Reports from the Kornheiser family indicate that watching a game with Tony Kornheiser on the couch is as or more annoying than watching it with him commentating on TV

WASHINGTON, DC -- Reports from the nation's capital this holiday season indicate that although Monday Night Football is over for the year, commentator Tony Kornheiser is just as annouing as [continue reading...]

Posted on January 12th, 2009

Korhnheiser makes MNF execs wistful for halcyon days of Dennis Miller

CHICAGO, IL -- As yet another season's worth of Monday Night Football featuring Tony Kornheiser draws to a close, the higher-ups who handle the ESPN's sole pro football property are [continue reading...]

Posted on December 23rd, 2008

Playboy Playmate named guest offensive coordinator for Philadelphia Eagles

PHILADELPHIA, PA – In a surprise move Friday, Philadelphia Eagles head coach Andy Reid named Kendra Wilkinson, fiancée of Eagles wide receiver Hank Baskett and star of TV’s The Girls [continue reading...]

Posted on December 20th, 2008

Kornheiser spends most Sunday nights sleeping in a Dumpster

HOUSTON, TX -- A Burger King employee was startled this morning to find ESPN Monday Night Football announcer Tony Kornheiser fastasleep in the bottom of the trash receptacle. "I'm a big [continue reading...]

Posted on December 1st, 2008

Jaws totally drank from Kornheiser’s soda last night; “Act of War,” says Kornheiser

PHOENIX, AZ -- In what was either a complete accident or an overt act of war, Ron Jaworski reached down and took a sip of soda last night, setting off [continue reading...]

Posted on November 11th, 2008

Brady, Moss caught playing ‘Screw, Marry, Kill’ with Lynch, O’Neal, and Hobbs

FOXBORO, MA—Scandal erupted in Patriots training camp yesterday when members of the media walked in on pro-bowlers Tom Brady and Randy Moss engaging in the game known as “Screw, marry, [continue reading...]

Posted on September 2nd, 2008

Another controversial endorsement for Ditka

CHICAGO, IL -- Just over three years ago, Mike Ditka made headlines across the country when he agreed to become the spokesman for Levitra – a pharmaceutical solution for erectile [continue reading...]

Posted on April 11th, 2007

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