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Baltimore mayor to change name to “Steelerssuckballsxon”

BALTIMORE, MD -- In a somewhat extreme response to Pittsburgh counterpart Luke Ravenstahl changing his last name to Steelerstahl, Baltimore Mayor Sheila Dixon will become Sheila Steelerssuckballsxon later this morning. "I [continue reading...]

Posted on January 16th, 2009

Two dudes in Tampa pretty nervous about getting stabbed by Ray Lewis’s entourage three weeks from tonight

TAMPA, FL -- Juan Montanez and Cecil "Lucky C" Whitman are freaking out today, with the anticipation that one of them will almost surely be stabbed by one of [continue reading...]

Posted on January 12th, 2009

Harrison seeks legal advice from Lewis, Simpson

Marvin’s just looking for a little help from Ray and O.J.

PHILADELPHIA, PA -- Under investigation regarding his involvement in a Philadelphia shooting, Indianapolis Colts' wide receiver Marvin Harrison is not taking any chances. An anonymous source close to the Pro Bowler [continue reading...]

Posted on June 29th, 2008

Hurricane ranking scale to use NFL players

MIAMI, FL -- SSNN has learned that the National Hurricane Center, a division of the National Weather Service, will announce later today that it is changing its ratings system from [continue reading...]

Posted on June 22nd, 2007


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