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ARCHIVES — KG: “Facebook would be more fun if I had gone to college”

Enjoy this encore presentation of a classic SSNN piece. BOSTON, MA -- Though there have not been many occasions when he has regretted his decision of more than ten years ago, [continue reading...]

Posted on November 21st, 2008

Pierce injures leg, unable to take out garbage

Pierce’s leg injury appears to be recurring

BOSTON, MA -- While Boston fans were celebrating their 17th NBA championship on Tuesday night, one of the key cogs from their latest championship squad was suffering déjà vu. Mere [continue reading...]

Posted on June 18th, 2008

Satan to lead Celtics victory parade, collect on debt of souls

This isn’t exactly what Satan looks like, but it’s close

BOSTON, MA -- In celebration of their first NBA championship in 22 years, the city of Boston has scheduled a victory parade for their beloved Celtics. The parade will be [continue reading...]

Posted on June 18th, 2008

Pierce says wheelchair is his normal mode of transportation

Paul Pierce, sans wheelchair

BOSTON, MA -- Boston Celtics forward Paul Pierce is downplaying the way his teammates carried him off the court, and his use of a wheelchair to get to the locker [continue reading...]

Posted on June 10th, 2008

Jackson, Lakers practice excuses

Phil Jackson’s not smug, he just knows more than you

LOS ANGELES, CA -- Los Angeles Lakers head coach Phil Jackson, along with his team, went to the Staples Center conference room for an interesting workout after Monday's practice in [continue reading...]

Posted on June 10th, 2008

Celtics attribute recent road woes to absence of Garnett nightlight, lucky blanket

KG needs his nightlight and blankie…

BOSTON, MA -- Boston Celtics head coach Doc Rivers has remained mum on the reason for his team's highly suspect play on the road in the first two rounds of [continue reading...]

Posted on May 20th, 2008

Pierce, Garnett auditioning new members for “Big 3″

KG and Pierce need a new third wheel…

BOSTON, MA -- Up 2-0 on the Atlanta Hawks in their first round playoff series, and with many fans predicting a championship run, everything would appear to be perfect for [continue reading...]

Posted on April 25th, 2008

Celtics offer thanks to Atlanta for exhibition games

KG considers another exhibition game

BOSTON, MA -- In a class move by a class franchise, the entire Boston Celtics organization held a press conference early Thursday to thank the Atlanta Hawks for the past [continue reading...]

Posted on April 24th, 2008

Garnett trying to get Pierce to watch Swingers with him

BOSTON, MA -- In what is quickly generating the potential for internal conflict on a team attempting to win an NBA Championship, reports from Bostin indicate that Kevin Garnett really [continue reading...]

Posted on January 10th, 2008

Celtics beat Knicks by 45; Boston fans disgusted

BOSTON, MA -- The Boston Celtics, wanting to make a statement about their ability to contend in the NBA East this year, narrowly beat the New York Knicks by 45 [continue reading...]

Posted on November 30th, 2007

KG: “Facebook would be more fun if I had gone to college”

BOSTON, MA -- Though there have not been many occasions when he has regretted his decision of more than ten years ago, Kevin Garnett has recently admitted that he has [continue reading...]

Posted on November 18th, 2007

Boston sports fans confident apocalypse is near

BOSTON, MA -- The recent success of Boston sports teams has led many Bostonians to speculate that the apocalypse is near. "Oh, abso-fuckin'-lutely," Boston sports fan, Bert McNulty told SSNN. [continue reading...]

Posted on November 13th, 2007

Pierce: new Celtics “too intense”

BOSTON, MA -- Though the preseason is nary a couple of weeks old, the grumbling has already started in Boston, led by veteran Paul Pierce. "This team has gotten [continue reading...]

Posted on October 29th, 2007

Pierce: new Celtics “too intense” [CONTINUED]

Back to Page 1 | Page 2 "KG talks about championships all the time, man," Pierce said. "It's a little annoying, to be honest. I mean, yeah, it's great to [continue reading...]

Posted on October 29th, 2007

Celtics explore trade possibilities

BOSTON, MA -- Boston Celtics General Manager Danny Ainge is getting a bit squirrelly. Ever since the Celtics' worst-case scenario played itself out before his beady, vacant eyes at the [continue reading...]

Posted on July 2nd, 2007


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