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New Orleans Archives

Pretty much every stripper in New Orleans wants to get nailed by Jeremy Shockey

NEW ORLEANS, LA -- SSNN has learned that pretty much every stripper in New Orleans wants to get nailed by Jeremy Shockey pretty bad right now. "I gotta be honest, I [continue reading...]

Posted on August 28th, 2008

Mayor of New Orleans didn’t know Hornets were in playoffs

NEW ORLEANS, LA -- New Orleans mayor Ray Nagin was both thrilled and stunned Tuesday when, while channel surfing, he stumbled across the New Orleans Hornets playing a basketball game. "I [continue reading...]

Posted on May 14th, 2008

Citing failures in New Orleans, NBA moving ‘09 All-Star to Jakarta

NEW ORLEANS, LA -- Describing the All-Star Weekend in New Orleans as a "monumental error in judgment and a tremendous letdown," NBA commissioner David Stern announced that next year's All-Star [continue reading...]

Posted on February 19th, 2008

Jamario Moon skipping dunk contest for fantasy reasons

Citing a tremendous desire to fulfill his fantasy basketball duties, Jamario Moon has withdrawn from the forthcoming NBA All-Star weekend slam dunk contest. "I need to focus on my real obligations," [continue reading...]

Posted on January 15th, 2008

Brees honored by Nagin, New Orleans

NEW ORLEANS, LA -- When the New Orleans Saints signed Drew Brees last year, few expected him to make the kind of impact he did over the course of his [continue reading...]

Posted on June 7th, 2007

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