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NCAA basketball Archives
Curmudgeons unite over Packer firing
NEW YORK, NY -- In a rare show of solidarity today, leading curmudgeons around the world gathered to protest CBS Sports' decision to part ways with college basketball commentator Billy [continue reading...]
Posted on July 15th, 2008
Pearl to open jewelry store
KNOXVILLE, TN -- Looking to capitalize on his local stardom and already thinking about life after basketball, Tennessee Volunteer head basketball coach Bruce Pearl announced today he plans on opening [continue reading...]
Posted on June 19th, 2008
Noah too high to understand charges against son
PARIS, FRANCE -- For all their strange behavior – and stranger hair – it seems that at least one age-old maxim applies to the Noah family: like father, like son. [continue reading...]
Posted on May 27th, 2008
Crean sees progress in player’s arrest
BLOOMINGTON, IN -- Following forward Eli Holman's brief arrest by Indiana University campus police on Thursday, new Hoosiers head coach Tom Crean said the basketball program is making strides in [continue reading...]
Posted on May 5th, 2008
Entire KU team declares for NBA draft
LAWRENCE, KS -- The entire National Championship-winning Kansas Jayhawks basketball team has declared for the NBA draft as a collective unit, SSNN has learned. Cole Aldrich, Darrell Arthur, Brennan Bechard, Chase [continue reading...]
Posted on April 24th, 2008
OSU denies interviewing Self impersonators for head coaching vacancy
STILLWATER, OK -- In a hastily assembled press conference this morning, members of Oklahoma State University's athletic department denied rumors it had interviewed several Bill Self impersonators to replace fired [continue reading...]
Posted on April 18th, 2008
Calipari looking to practice free throws “at least once a week”
MEMPHIS, TN -- Now that the smoke has cleared and the dust has settled on the men's college basketball season, Memphis Tigers head coach John Calipari – he of a [continue reading...]
Posted on April 16th, 2008
MIT simulation finds Self, Jayhawks on short end of stick
CAMBRIDGE, MA -- Kansas Jayhawks fans are presumably up-in-arms today, after published reports claim a group of researchers at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology have unanimously concluded that KU has [continue reading...]
Posted on April 5th, 2008
Confused Noah cuts down nets after Bulls win
CHICAGO, IL -- With his teammates and a few perplexed fans looking on, Chicago Bulls forward Joakim Noah proceeded to cut down the nets last night after the team's 101-98 [continue reading...]
Posted on April 4th, 2008
Elderly secretary’s confusion lands Lopez brothers at top of WNBA draft boards
PALO ALTO, CA -- An elderly secretary's confusion could cost Stanford's "Twin Towers" – Brook and Robin Lopez – millions of dollars. After declaring for the draft and signing with [continue reading...]
Posted on April 2nd, 2008
Isiah “in” for Indiana job; school officials not amused
INDIANAPOLIS, IN -- When Tony Bennett formally removed himself from the running to be the next head basketball coach at Indiana University over the weekend, the decision was met with [continue reading...]
Posted on April 1st, 2008
Longhorn fans confused by new game
HOUSTON, TX -- Going into Sunday's game against Memphis, many college basketball experts predicted the Texas Longhorns would enjoy a huge hometown advantage with the game played mere hours from [continue reading...]
Posted on March 31st, 2008
First grade class arrested for gambling on NCAA Tournament
WASHINGTON D.C. -- Numerous law enforcement agencies collaborated Friday to take down what they called a major gambling ring going on in the nation's capital. Agents from the FBI, ATF [continue reading...]
Posted on March 29th, 2008
CBS execs to begin giving Nantz testosterone injections
DETROIT, MI -- CBS announced Wednesday it will be taking unprecedented measures to further improve the already stellar television ratings generated by its coverage of the NCAA tournament. A source within [continue reading...]
Posted on March 27th, 2008
NASA funding threatened after computer picks Villanova to win championship
HOUSTON, TX -- Encouraged by Villanova's improbable advancement into the third round of the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament, NASA announced yesterday that a specially designed supercomputer had predicted "all along" [continue reading...]
Posted on March 25th, 2008
NCAA to sanction multiple coaches for giving change to homeless
INDIANAPOLIS, IN -- Several years ago, the NCAA came down on then University of Utah men's head basketball coach Rick Majerus for buying one of his players, Keith Van Horn, [continue reading...]
Posted on March 24th, 2008
Man frantically calls friends to brag about Davidson victory
ROUND ROCK, TX -- Rocco Gill was more than a little worried when he got to his cell phone Sunday afternoon and discovered he had missed seven calls from his [continue reading...]
Posted on March 24th, 2008
Huggins had Duke in office pool, has mixed feelings about surprise win
MORGANTOWN, WV -- West Virginia head basketball coach Bob Huggins was happy that his team was able to upset Duke in the second round of the NCAA tournament, but the [continue reading...]
Posted on March 24th, 2008
Coach K: “We kept it close on purpose”
ANAHEIM, CA -- Only a day after a scare against the Belmont Bruins, Duke head coach Mike Krzyzewski explained his team's poor performance against the cinderella 15th seed. "I know [continue reading...]
Posted on March 21st, 2008
Arizona team not happy with NCAA tournament invitation
TUCSON, AZ -- The University of Arizona basketball team experienced great disappointment on Selection Sunday, when they learned that they earned a tenth seed in the prestigious NCAA tournament and [continue reading...]
Posted on March 19th, 2008
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