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2008 Top 20, #14: Phillies extend Hamels with an 28-year, $937 million contract

PHILADELPHIA, PA -- Following a dominant National League Championship Series in which the lefthander won the MVP award, Cole Hamels has been given a contract extension by the Philadelphia Phillies [continue reading...]

Posted on December 28th, 2008

Pujols told he’s MVP — responds, “Of the Cardinals?”

ST. LOUIS, MO -- When he found out he was named MVP, Albert Pujols was floored. "I honestly cannot believe this honor," Pujols said. "I'm so thankful to my teammates [continue reading...]

Posted on November 18th, 2008

Cy Young winner Lincecum anticipating severe dehydration and flulike symptoms tomorrow

SAN FRANCISCO, CA -- Emergency medical staff and hospital personnel throughout the Bay Area are on high alert after news broke Tuesday that Tim Lincecum would be receiving the 2008 [continue reading...]

Posted on November 12th, 2008

Poll conducted by Zambrano shows Zambrano as NL MVP

CHICAGO, IL -- Carlos Zambrano has election fever. The star pitcher for the Cubs has taken it upon himself to take a poll concerning the National League MVP voting that has [continue reading...]

Posted on October 29th, 2008

Phillies extend Hamels with an 28-year, $937 million contract

PHILADELPHIA, PA -- Following a dominant National League Championship Series in which the lefthander won the MVP award, Cole Hamels has been given a contract extension by the Philadelphia Phillies [continue reading...]

Posted on October 16th, 2008

Sabathia credits Boss for NL dominance

CC thinks the Boss is boss, boss.

MILWAUKEE, WI -- Recently acquired Brewer's pitcher CC Sabathia has gone on a tear as of late – with an 8-0 record and an ERA of 1.60 in his nine [continue reading...]

Posted on August 22nd, 2008

Baseball owners want to use instant replay to review Selig hiring

If owners have their way, Selig’s hiring could be overturned by instant replay.

NEW YORK, NY -- As the professional baseball owners gather to consider instant replay, SSNN has learned that many of the owners are interested in using the technology to take [continue reading...]

Posted on August 19th, 2008

Minaya focusing on fantasy team more than Mets

Minaya has more important things to worry about than the Mets

NEW YORK, NY -- Whether the New York Mets are willing to admit it or not, Aaron Heilman is unavailable. That is the report that is circulating through the league as [continue reading...]

Posted on July 29th, 2008

Cole Hamels would have pitched the 16th for NL

Hamels could strike you out just by smirking at you…

NEW YORK, NY -- A panicked Clint Hurdle, realizing that he had only Brandon Webb and Brad Lidge left for the rest of the game, allegedly launched a secret plan [continue reading...]

Posted on July 17th, 2008

Pennsylvania small-business owner furious with National League

Local employer holds Uggla responsible for unproductive workday.

READING, PA -- Dan Kostansky, 41, is absolutely furious today with the National League All-Star team for robbing him of potentially the most productive workday of the year. "We've got eight [continue reading...]

Posted on July 16th, 2008

80’s singer Corey Hart wins online All-Star vote

Corey Hart, wearing sunglasses, possibly at night.

NEW YORK, NY -- In a victory deemed by many baseball experts as a shocking upset, singer Corey Hart won an online fan vote for the final spot on the [continue reading...]

Posted on July 13th, 2008

Scratched DVD added to AL All-Stars

Selig doesn’t want to hear your whining - HE is the decider!

NEW YORK CITY, NY -- In a surprising turn of events, MLB has decided to add another roster player to the 2008 American League All-Star team. While most thought the [continue reading...]

Posted on July 10th, 2008

Changes in store for All-Star Game

Bud Selig’s face is stuck like this…

NEW YORK CITY, NY -- After a wildly popular voting session that boasted an all-time high 20 million votes, MLB commissioner Bud Selig announced today that there will be a [continue reading...]

Posted on July 7th, 2008

Twins defect to NL, lead West division by four games

Mauer spearheaded the Twins’ move to the NL West

MINNEAPOLIS, MN -- In what has been called a daring midnight escape, the entire Minnesota Twins organization defected from the gray, dreary American League Central to the sunny climes of [continue reading...]

Posted on June 28th, 2008

Steinbrenner suing MLB in wake of Wang injury

Hank is suing MLB and Selig

NEW YORK CITY, NY -- After ace pitcher Chien-Ming Wang suffered an injured foot during yesterday's game in Houston against the Astros, New York Yankees boss Hank Steinbrenner has filed [continue reading...]

Posted on June 16th, 2008

Steinbrenner suing MLB in wake of Wang injury

NEW YORK CITY, NY -- After ace pitcher Chien-Ming Wang suffered an injured foot during yesterday's game in Houston against the Astros, New York Yankees boss Hank Steinbrenner has filed [continue reading...]

Posted on June 16th, 2008

Soriano hoping to buy AT&T Park’s enormous glove

AP Photo - Ross D. Franklin

SAN FRANCISCO, CA -- Though they sit at just 25-34, thirteen games back of the league-leading Cubs, the San Francisco Giants have something that Chicago's NL franchise – or, more [continue reading...]

Posted on June 4th, 2008

MLB establishment, press, fans all excited about AL East expansion

BOSTON, MA -- Sportswriters across America are baffled by the emergence of other teams in the American League East this season. Newspapers and websites alike – not to mention the [continue reading...]

Posted on May 20th, 2008

Pat Burrell could totally sleep with your wife right now (if he wanted to)

Hey readers (especially you male readers)!!!! What's happenin'? I just wanted to let you know that Pat Burrell could totally sleep with your wife right now (if he wanted to). [continue reading...]

Posted on May 2nd, 2008


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