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Cubs finally allow Fukudome’s interpreter to reveal 100-year title drought

Fukudome has an unpleasant surprise waiting for him…

CHICAGO, IL -- Sitting atop the NL Central with more than a month of baseball's regular season under their belt, Chicago Cubs management finally told Kosuke Fukudome's interpreter to explain [continue reading...]

Posted on May 1st, 2008

Patrick looks forward to winning again in a couple years

Danica Patrick

TOKYO, JAPAN -- Danica Patrick waited a long time to win her first IndyCar Series race. It took her three years and fifty races to score her first victory, which [continue reading...]

Posted on April 21st, 2008

Indians keep asking rookie to eat stuff

CLEVELAND, OH -- At first, new Cleveland Indians reliever Masahide Kobayashi just thought his new teammates were being nice, that they were just trying to get acclimated to a new [continue reading...]

Posted on March 29th, 2008

Matsui even more alienated after anus surgery

KISSIMMEE, FL -- Kaz Matsui thought he had heard it all. Taunts of being too small, too un-American, and too Japanese to hit a fastball have been the norm during [continue reading...]

Posted on March 28th, 2008

Manny frightened by time travel, refusing to leave Japan

TOKYO, JAPAN -- The defending World Series Champion Boston Red Sox have returned home from Japan with a win, a loss, and a newfound respect for Japanese culture. One thing [continue reading...]

Posted on March 28th, 2008

Riding high, Red Sox now refuse to travel to New York

TOKYO, JAPAN -- Fresh off Wednesday's successful boycott, which forced Major League Baseball to compensate Boston's coaches and staff for their trip to Japan, the Boston Red Sox are now [continue reading...]

Posted on March 22nd, 2008

FCC declares Fukudome offensive, not suitable for television

CHICAGO, IL -- The Chicago Cubs were more than thrilled when prized Japanese free agent Kosuke Fukudome accepted a four-year, $48 million offer to play for everyone's favorite lovable losers. [continue reading...]

Posted on December 20th, 2007


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