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Isiah Thomas Archives

Isiah Thomas clears up cover-up controversy: “It was actually Barack Obama”

NEW YORK, NY -- Hours after Isiah Thomas was publicly eviscerated by Harrison, N.Y. police chief David Hall for attempting to use his daughter in a cover-up regarding an overdose [continue reading...]

Posted on October 26th, 2008

Detroit Shock wins third consecutive WNBA title, according to eyewitness account

DETROIT, MI—The WNBA, long believed to have gone the way of the dodo and the XFL, has been the subject of intense underground rumors of late, specifically concerning the legendary [continue reading...]

Posted on September 30th, 2008

Satan to Yankees fans: “It’s out of my hands”

NEW YORK, NY -- Yankee fans woke up to horrifying news this morning, after Satan, Prince of Lies and Ruler of Darkness, gave a dour prognosis for the Bronx Bombers. [continue reading...]

Posted on August 28th, 2008

Electronic Arts announces recall, delayed release of NBA Live ‘09

REDWOOD CITY, CA -- Electronic Arts, maker of the EA Sports line of video games, announced today that they are pushing back the release of this year's version of their [continue reading...]

Posted on June 12th, 2008

Thomas vows to return Walsh’s calls eventually

NEW YORK, NY -- Isiah Thomas, head coach of the struggling New York Knicks, claims not to be deeply concerned about phone calls from new Knicks president Donnie Walsh. Despite his [continue reading...]

Posted on April 10th, 2008

Isiah “in” for Indiana job; school officials not amused

INDIANAPOLIS, IN -- When Tony Bennett formally removed himself from the running to be the next head basketball coach at Indiana University over the weekend, the decision was met with [continue reading...]

Posted on April 1st, 2008

Walsh out after embarrassing 4-game winning streak

INDIANAPOLIS, IN -- The Indiana Pacers have won four games in a row, and owners Herb and Mel Simon aren't happy about it. Sitting just a game and a half [continue reading...]

Posted on March 25th, 2008

Stern creating new postseason tournament

MEMPHIS, TN -- The Memphis Grizzlies have not won a single playoff game in their franchise's history. Since 2001, the New York Knicks have had a losing record every season [continue reading...]

Posted on March 21st, 2008

Isiah attempting to trade for Tiger

NEW YORK CITY, NY -- In an attempt to save the floundering New York Knicks, embattled coach Isiah Thomas has contacted representatives of the PGA Tour, and is attempting to [continue reading...]

Posted on March 13th, 2008

Skiles thankful for holiday firing

CHICAGO, IL – After spending Christmas Day with his family – who had traveled to Chicago for the occasion – fired Bulls coach Scott Skiles seemed to have gained fresh [continue reading...]

Posted on December 26th, 2007

Isiah trades Curry to Globetrotters for guy who throws confetti

NEW YORK CITY, NY -- Raising further questions about his ability as an NBA GM, Isiah Thomas made another controversial move today when he traded center Eddy Curry to the [continue reading...]

Posted on December 9th, 2007

Knicks to stage mock presidential debate

NEW YORK, NY -- Almost as soon as the idea came forth, Isiah Thomas called "dibbs!" "I got Barack Obama," Thomas shouted nearly instantly after the New York Knicks decided they [continue reading...]

Posted on December 6th, 2007

Pamela Anderson named new Knicks assistant

NEW YORK, NY -- New York Knicks GM Isiah Thomas announced today that the embattled franchise has hired Pamela Anderson as its new marketing director, replacing Anucha Brown Sanders. Sanders, [continue reading...]

Posted on October 25th, 2007

Local sportscaster’s absurd prediction made boldly

NEW YORK, NY -- While co-hosting the 1-4 PM EST time slot on ESPN radio – formerly held by Dan Patrick – New York Yankees announcer Michael Kay made an [continue reading...]

Posted on August 24th, 2007

Blazers trade top pick, avoid responsibility

PORTLAND, OR -- The Portland Trailblazers announced late Tuesday that they plan to trade the number one overall draft pick to the New York. It has been a forgone conclusion [continue reading...]

Posted on June 27th, 2007

Chandler to enter draft

CHICAGO, IL -- DePaul sophomore Wilson Chandler announced last week that he will declare himself eligible for the 2007 NBA Draft. The 6-8 forward led the Blue Demons in points, rebounds [continue reading...]

Posted on April 15th, 2007

Knicks try new approach with Curry

NEW YORK, NY -- Since the day he was drafted by the Chicago Bulls in 2001, expectations have been high for Eddy Curry. His imposing size and obvious physical ability [continue reading...]

Posted on April 3rd, 2007

Thomas planning more additions

NEW YORK, NY -- In a strange move late last week, the New York Knicks signed Randolph Morris directly out of the University of Kentucky. "Man is this cool," general [continue reading...]

Posted on March 26th, 2007

Thomas gets New York ‘Day’

NEW YORK, NY -- Less than two weeks after receiving an extension as president and head coach for the Knicks, Isiah Thomas will have a day named for him by [continue reading...]

Posted on March 22nd, 2007

Isiah Thomas on NBA luxury tax: “I had no idea it existed”

NEW YORK -- Only a few days after Jamal Crawford's season-ending stress fracture – and only one day after his absence contributed to a loss at the hands of the [continue reading...]

Posted on March 2nd, 2007