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Furious Archie Manning sends loser sons to bed without dinner

OXFORD, MS—Recalling that his boys had promised “never to come home again without a Super Bowl championship” and saying that he had “never heard of such appalling underachievement”, an infuriated [continue reading...]

Posted on January 19th, 2009

Dungy calls Phil Jackson, asks for advice on tell-all book trashing star player

INDIANAPOLIS, IN—Reports have begun surfacing today that Colts head coach Tony Dungy will be stepping down and retiring from football after a tenure with Indianapolis that included seven playoff appearances [continue reading...]

Posted on January 13th, 2009

Peyton Manning blows New Year’s Resolution not to get smoked by an inferior team in the playoffs

INDIANAPOLIS--Millions of Americans are swarming gyms, being nicer to their mothers, and quitting smoking this week, as 2009's new year's resolutions hit the ground with full force. As the weeks [continue reading...]

Posted on January 6th, 2009

Furious Manning blames MVP award for playoff loss

INDIANAPOLIS, IN—Peyton Manning joined a very exclusive and elite club on Friday, becoming only the second man ever to win three NFL MVP awards in the modern era, equaling the [continue reading...]

Posted on January 4th, 2009

Entire Jaguars offense misses bus (barely)

Entire Jaguars offense misses bus (barely) JAcKSONVILLE, FL -- The entire Jacksonville Jaguars offense, led by quarterback David Garrard, missed the team bus back to the hotel where they stay the [continue reading...]

Posted on December 19th, 2008

Peyton Manning goes “off register” on Ashley’s Christmas gift

INDIANAPOLIS, IN—Colts quarterback Peyton Manning learned a valuable lesson last year when he forgot to buy presents for his wife Ashley in the holiday rush. Although tragedy was narrowly averted [continue reading...]

Posted on December 18th, 2008

Ashley Manning furious with Peyton over Iron Gym pull-up bar purchase

INDIANAPOLIS, IN -- There is only one rule in the Manning household -- no surprises. That is why Ashley Manning is furious with her husband Peyton after his recent purchase [continue reading...]

Posted on December 17th, 2008

Colts would like Peyton Manning to be a little more folksy, like Sarah Palin

INDIANAPOLIS, IN -- The Indianapolis Colts, less than two years removed from a Super Bowl title, have made an unusual request to quarterback Peyton Manning. "Yes, we did make a request [continue reading...]

Posted on October 3rd, 2008

Harrison seeks legal advice from Lewis, Simpson

Marvin’s just looking for a little help from Ray and O.J.

PHILADELPHIA, PA -- Under investigation regarding his involvement in a Philadelphia shooting, Indianapolis Colts' wide receiver Marvin Harrison is not taking any chances. An anonymous source close to the Pro Bowler [continue reading...]

Posted on June 29th, 2008

Man arrested for sending threatening letters to NFL players

ORLANDO, FL -- A Florida man was arrested yesterday in Orlando after being identified as the sender of multiple menacing letters to approximately twenty NFL players – including Reggie Bush, [continue reading...]

Posted on May 13th, 2008

Harrison admits to vigilante activities

PHILADELPHIA, PA -- A recent shooting near one of his Philadelphia-area businesses has forced Colts wide receiver Marvin Harrison to reveal his secretive off-field life. Harrison told reporters today that [continue reading...]

Posted on May 9th, 2008

Johnson surprised to learn cheerleader he proposed to leaving Bengals

chad_johnson-helmet_on

CINCINNATI, OH -- After being blindsided last week by the news that fellow Bengal receiver Chris Henry had been released by the team following the latest in his long string [continue reading...]

Posted on April 9th, 2008

Proehl seeking trademark on white receiver comparisons

NEW YORK CITY, NY -- Former NFL wide receiver Ricky Proehl had a great career. In his 17 years in the league, he caught over 650 passes for nearly 9,000 [continue reading...]

Posted on March 24th, 2008

Brady tired of beating Mannings

GLENDALE, AZ -- Tom Brady, usually unflappable leading up to important games, has shown uncharacteristic sensitivity to a number of issues as Super Bowl XLII approaches. In addition to admitting [continue reading...]

Posted on February 2nd, 2008

Archie Manning buys tickets to wrong game

NEW ORLEANS, LA -- Archie Manning is out several thousand dollars after mistakenly buying plane and game tickets for this Sunday's game in Foxboro, Mass. Between the Patriots and Chargers, [continue reading...]

Posted on January 17th, 2008

Peyton Manning experiencing really weird feelings toward brother Eli

INDIANAPOLIS, IN – Peyton Manning reported this week that he’s feeling some really unusual feelings directed at his brother Eli, including some feelings that he’s never felt toward Eli before [continue reading...]

Posted on January 16th, 2008

Peyton Manning audibles out of wife’s book club

INDIANAPOLIS, IN -- Preparing for next week's playoff game, Colts quarterback Peyton Manning may have already made his most important call of the season. The NFL star demonstrated his mastery [continue reading...]

Posted on January 7th, 2008

One game left: Manning shifts focus to Pro Bowl

A frustrated Peyton Manning blamed his first Super Bowl win on Rex Grossman, and then lashed out at his Pro Bowl teammates for celebrating too early. "What are you doing?" Manning [continue reading...]

Posted on January 1st, 2008

Putin backs Belichick as successor

MOSCOW -- Russian leader Vladimir Putin has backed New England Patriots Head Coach Bill Belichick to replace him as president next year, according to a Russian media report obtained by [continue reading...]

Posted on December 10th, 2007

Unattended Peyton Manning buys Ed Hardy Shirt

INDIANAPOLIS, IN -- A Thursday evening shopping trip to a local Nordstrom's erupted into chaos when Peyton Manning wandered unsupervised into the men's section and began picking his own clothing. "I [continue reading...]

Posted on November 17th, 2007

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