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Heisman Trophy Archives

2008 Top 20, #11: CBS announcer goes to ER after Tebowner lasts for more than four hours

ATLANTA, GA -- At approximately 11 pm Saturday night, CBS sports announcer Gary Danielson realized it was time to head for the emergency room. "Every single commercial for a male virility [continue reading...]

Posted on December 29th, 2008

Tebow wins Wilson award for third year in a row

HOLLYWOOD, CA -- While the Heisman winner won't be announced until Saturday, Tim Tebow added yet another prestigious piece of hardware to his mantle. Tebow was announced Friday as the winner [continue reading...]

Posted on December 12th, 2008

Colt McCoy worried Palin has “gone rogue” on Heisman campaign

AUSTIN, TX -- Texas Lonhorns quarterback Colt McCoy is expressing concern today that Alaska Governor Sarah Palin has become a hindrance to his Heisman Trophy campaign. "We think she's going rogue," [continue reading...]

Posted on December 10th, 2008

CBS announcer goes to ER after Tebowner lasts for more than four hours

ATLANTA, GA -- At approximately 11 pm Saturday night, CBS sports announcer Gary Danielson realized it was time to head for the emergency room. "Every single commercial for a male virility [continue reading...]

Posted on December 7th, 2008

Chase Daniel awarded 2008 Heisman trophy

JEFFERSON CITY, MO -- In another startling move from the Missouri legislature, the body has decided to award Mizzou quarterback Chase Daniel the 2008 Heisman trophy. "I'm pleased to [continue reading...]

Posted on September 24th, 2008

McFadden to forego draft, go straight to Hall

INDIANAPOLIS, IN -- Former Arkansas running back Darren McFadden arrived in Indianapolis late Wednesday for the NFL Scouting Combine, presumably ready to flash the skills that have led many experts [continue reading...]

Posted on February 22nd, 2008

FROM THE ARCHIVES: Gainesville Presbyterian church now “First Church of Tebow”

In celebration of Tim Tebow's Heisman Trophy win over Darren McFadden, Colt Brennan and Chase Daniel, SSNN looks back to a classic tale of Tebow's prowess. GAINESVILLE, FL -- The legend [continue reading...]

Posted on December 8th, 2007

FROM THE ARCHIVES: Oregon faculty doesn’t understand popular “Dixon Your Mouth” signs

Dennis Dixon may have fallen out of the Heisman race with his unfortunate knee injury, but that doesn't make his last name any less useful for funny signs... EUGENE, OR -- [continue reading...]

Posted on December 8th, 2007

Tebow jogging to Heisman ceremonies from Gainesville

NEW YORK CITY, NY -- In a move designed to attract more Heisman voters, Florida QB Tim Tebow is nearing the end of a long jog to the Heisman ceremonies [continue reading...]

Posted on December 8th, 2007

Oregon faculty doesn’t understand popular “Dixon Your Mouth” signs

EUGENE, OR -- A mixture of frat humor and college ingenuity has caused confusion among University of Oregon faculty this football season. Since skyrocketing up the polls as a result of [continue reading...]

Posted on November 14th, 2007

Testaverde’s buddies preferred him as armchair QB

CHARLOTTE, NC -- When the Carolina Panthers signed 43-year-old, veteran NFL Quarterback Vinny Testaverde last week, not everyone was happy about the deal. "We miss our boy," said Long Island, [continue reading...]

Posted on October 24th, 2007

Ravens draft Smith, admit mistake

BALTIMORE, MD -- During Sunday afternoon's second day of the NFL Draft, the Baltimore Ravens announced that they planned to release former Ohio State quarterback and Heisman Trophy winner Troy [continue reading...]

Posted on April 30th, 2007

Williams vows to change, take drug use seriously

MIAMI, FL -- After a record-breaking collegiate career, Ricky Williams' life as a pro football player has been a roller-coaster ride of success and disgrace. Since entering the NFL, the [continue reading...]

Posted on April 2nd, 2007

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