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Detroit Lions Archives

Kitna predicts Lions will win Super Bowl, end world hunger

DETROIT, MI -- Last season, Detroit Lions quarterback Jon Kitna made a bold prediction that his team couldn't quite live up to – now he expects even bigger things in [continue reading...]

Posted on May 15th, 2008

Kitna: Lions will end world hunger, global warming, wars

DETROIT, MI -- Last season, Lions quarterback Jon Kitna made a bold prediction his team couldn’t quite live up to. Now he expects even bigger things in Detroit in [continue reading...]

Posted on May 11th, 2008

Millen reveals Lions’ draft plans

DETROIT, MI -- After a somewhat disappointing 7-9 season, many Detroit Lions' fans are worried about the team's future. But team president Matt Millen addressed those concerns today in a [continue reading...]

Posted on March 11th, 2008

Madden sends Favre turducken in hopes of win Sunday

GREEN BAY, WI -- Legendary Oakland Raiders coach and current NBC Sunday Night Football commentator John Madden has continued his creepy fascination with Green Bay Packers quarterback Brett Favre days [continue reading...]

Posted on January 18th, 2008

Lovie: Orton’s spot safe with Bears

CHICAGO, IL -- With trade rumors swirling around the Bears acquiring Philadelphia quarterback Donovan Mcnabb in the offseason, coach Lovie Smith told the media that whatever happens, quarterback Kyle Orton’s [continue reading...]

Posted on January 17th, 2008

Julius Jones lays traps for Marion Barber around Dallas locker room

DALLAS, TX -- When Marion Barber III showed up to work on Sunday at Ford Field in Detroit, he was ready to play the Lions. Little did he know that [continue reading...]

Posted on December 10th, 2007

Jesus loves Warner more than Kitna

GLENDALE, AZ -- In a much-hyped battle between outspoken Christian quarterbacks Kurt Warner and Jon Kitna, Jesus made his feelings more than apparent by bestowing a victory upon Warner's Arizona [continue reading...]

Posted on November 12th, 2007

Williams attempts, fails to rectify tipping misdeeds

DETROIT, MI -- Detroit Lions' Wide Receiver Roy Williams is trying to make up for years of acting under a strict no-tipping policy, which he told the world about last [continue reading...]

Posted on October 18th, 2007

Roy Williams obsessed with being "first on Google"

DETROIT, MI -- Members of the Detroit Lions report that WR Roy Williams has become "absolutely obsessed" with being the first Roy Williams on Google. "Talks about it all the time," [continue reading...]

Posted on September 27th, 2007

Millen admits knowledge of affair has saved his job

DETROIT, MI -- With their pre-season debut approaching and a positive new outlook around Lions' training camp, President and CEO Matt Millen chose a strange time to expose himself as [continue reading...]

Posted on August 9th, 2007

Kitna vows lions will cure cancer

DETROIT, MI -- If members of the media questioned John Kitna's sanity when he vowed the Lions would win at least 10 games this upcoming season, the firestorm can only [continue reading...]

Posted on July 18th, 2007

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