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Curse Archives

Guy wearing headphones outside O’Leary home blames cow for fire

CHICAGO, IL -- Local concerned citizen Steve Bartman has cracked the case of the fire that tore through the heart of Chicago last week, identifying a cow that happened to [continue reading...]

Posted on August 15th, 2008

After hot start, Cubs brace for inevitably tough times

CHICAGO, IL -- Nearing the 100th anniversary of their last World Series title, the Chicago Cubs have thus far defied the negative culture that has smothered the franchise for nearly [continue reading...]

Posted on May 18th, 2008

Cubs to sell stadium, team, fans as package deal

CHICAGO, IL -- After months of talks with an Illinois state agency have failed to produce a deal for Wrigley Field, the Tribune Company – led by CEO Sam Zell [continue reading...]

Posted on May 14th, 2008

Cubs finally allow Fukudome’s interpreter to reveal 100-year title drought

CHICAGO, IL -- Sitting atop the NL Central with more than a month of baseball's regular season under their belt, Chicago Cubs management finally told Kosuke Fukudome's interpreter to explain [continue reading...]

Posted on May 1st, 2008

Mixed reactions for Cubs hot start

CHICAGO, IL -- One would think that after a 15-7 start by the perennial doormat know as the Chicago Cubs, spirits would be high on the North Side of the [continue reading...]

Posted on April 25th, 2008

Cubs win 10,000^th meaningless game

DENVER, CO -- The Chicago Cub's dramatic tenth-inning victory over the Colorado Rockies Wednesday night was more than just an early-season morale booster, it was one for the record books: [continue reading...]

Posted on April 24th, 2008

Dead cardinal, white sock found under Bartman’s seat at Wrigley

CHICAGO, IL -- Maybe Wrigley Field is cursed after all. Days after a Boston Red Sox fan who was working construction on the new Yankee Stadium buried a Red Sox [continue reading...]

Posted on April 15th, 2008

Construction workers find Schilling buried under new Yankee Stadium

NEW YORK CITY, NY -- Having previously excavated a David Ortiz jersey from the bowels of the new Yankee stadium, construction workers on Sunday discovered another artifact placed there for [continue reading...]

Posted on April 14th, 2008

Occultist worried third Boston World Series could wake the Babe

BRONX, NY -- Arnold Pencarne, an occult/memorabilia expert from the Bronx area, claims that if the Red Sox break the Curse of the Bambino a third time, it could result [continue reading...]

Posted on November 7th, 2007

Sweet Lou quits, blames curse

SAN DIEGO, CA -- Though Lou Piniella's post-game press conference Wenesday night saw a frustrated, unhappy coach seem to struggle for answers to his team's woes, nobody expected the first-year [continue reading...]

Posted on May 25th, 2007

Cubs, Curse reach agreement on extension

The Chicago Cubs announced today that they have reached a 99-year, $99 million extension with the Curse. The Curse's contract was due to expire after this season and it [continue reading...]

Posted on February 14th, 2007

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