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college basketball Archives

Cornell fan devises diabolical plan to get Big Red past Mizzou in NCAAs

ARLINGTON, VA -- Local patent attorney Mark Westeschtein is known for three things among his friends: his searingly intellectual prowess (normally viewed in application of the American patent process), his [continue reading...]

Posted on March 17th, 2009

CBS decision to ring in Obama presidency with “One Shining Moment” montage proves controversial

NEW YORK CITY, NY -- After spending most of the day Tuesday covering the inauguration of new US President Barack Obama, CBS television used the evening and all night to [continue reading...]

Posted on January 23rd, 2009

MIT simulation finds Self, Jayhawks on short end of stick

CAMBRIDGE, MA -- Kansas Jayhawks fans are presumably up-in-arms today, after published reports claim a group of researchers at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology have unanimously concluded that KU has [continue reading...]

Posted on April 5th, 2008

Rupp Arena banner to honor Duke’s four-game losing streak

Kentucky Athletic Director Mitch Barnhart announced Sunday night that the school plans to recognize Duke’s four-game losing streak by unveiling a banner before their next home game against LSU on [continue reading...]

Posted on January 4th, 2008

UK fan no longer wants Donovan after Florida loses 3 of 4

Kentucky fan Jay Marcum expressed frustration at Florida coach Billy Donovan after the Gators lost at Tennessee Tuesday night, marking the team's third loss in four games. "I [continue reading...]

Posted on January 4th, 2008

God angry at Obrzut for wasting height

HEAVEN - God expressed anger Thursday at Kentucky Wildcats’ center Lukasz Obrzut after the senior posted just a two-point, two-rebound performance against SEC foe Auburn on Wednesday night. [continue reading...]

Posted on January 1st, 2008

Stanford mathletes solve famous Trojan Theorem

After the surprising upset of Southern California, nine "mathletes" at Stanford University proved that it was possible for an incompetent football team coached by a psychotic ex-quarterback dud to defeat [continue reading...]

Posted on December 30th, 2007

Sampson’s three-ways result in NCAA violations

NORMAN, OK -- Kelvin Sampson's contact privileges have been handcuffed again. An intern at Indiana University's athletic compliance department uncovered evidence last week indicating the Hoosiers head basketball coach was [continue reading...]

Posted on April 5th, 2007

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