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Chicago Cubs Archives

Zambrano to take statistics at Northwestern

CHICAGO -- The Chicago Cubs' early exit from the playoffs this year has brought with it a silver lining for at least one player. Carlos Zambrano has announced that he will [continue reading...]

Posted on October 10th, 2008

Cubs infielders mad at Zambrano for inducing so many groundballs

SOMEWHERE BETWEEN CHICAGO AND LOS ANGELES -- As the Chicago Cubs traveled toward Los Angeles down two games to none against the Los Angeles Dodgers, several of the Cubs' infielders [continue reading...]

Posted on October 3rd, 2008

Carlos Zambrano tells teammates he would’ve voted against bailout plan

CHICAGO - Cubs pitcher Carlos Zambrano informed teammates Tuesday at practice that he "totally would've voted against the bailout" that failed to pass the House of Representatives on Monday. "Carlos came [continue reading...]

Posted on October 1st, 2008

Selig to Astros: “Stop complaining, or I’ll make you play the entire 2009 season in Montreal.”

HOUSTON, TX -- As many Houston Astros players and fans express their outrage at Bud Selig's decision to force the Astros to play two makeup "home games" in Milwaukee, Selig [continue reading...]

Posted on September 22nd, 2008

Harden invites teammates to view WALL-E

Rich Harden loves allegorical animated films.

CHICAGO, IL -- In what he hoped would be a team-building exercise that would let his teammates get to know him a bit better, Rich Harden invited several Cubs teammates [continue reading...]

Posted on August 6th, 2008

Zambrano used stunt double Sunday so he could attend Lollapalooza

Big Z was in his party outfit for Kanye West at Lollapalooza

CHICAGO, IL -- The Chicago Cubs are furious today after learning that Carlos Zambrano employed a stunt double for his start on Sunday, so he could attend Chicago's popular Lollapalooza [continue reading...]

Posted on August 5th, 2008

Cubs dynasty underway with second consecutive World Series title

October 15, 1908, from Chicago Sporting Fanatic With yesterday's 2-0 victory over the Detroit Tigers, our beloved Chicago Cubs did more than just win their second consecutive World Series – [continue reading...]

Posted on August 4th, 2008

Rays’ Maddon hailed as Second Coming

This is what Jesus looks like with thick-frame glasses and a crew cut.

TAMPA, FL -- Tampa Bay Rays manager Joe Maddon has, by the standards of many baseball experts, performed a miracle in leading his previously hapless squad to first place in [continue reading...]

Posted on July 10th, 2008

Source: Sabathia demanded trade to Milwaukee

Sabathia’s neck is well on its way to disappearing.

CLEVELAND, OH – Mere hours after the trade of C.C. Sabathia to the Milwaukee Brewers was reported by ESPN's Buster Olney, sources within the Cleveland Indians organization say the team [continue reading...]

Posted on July 7th, 2008

Major League managers pay tribute to Carlin

Some MLB managers stole this facial expression from Carlin, too

CHICAGO, IL -- The death of actor/comedian George Carlin has not only had an effect on the entertainment community, but the sports community as well. The stand-up legend's influence was [continue reading...]

Posted on June 24th, 2008

Cubs accidentally fire Lou Piniella

Lou’s a little hurt, but might come back

CHICAGO, IL -- Chicagoland sports websites, talk radio shows and barbershops are buzzing today after it was announced that the Cubs, who have baseball's best record, inadvertently fired Lou Piniella. According [continue reading...]

Posted on June 20th, 2008

Mayweather still insists he’s retired

Mayweather shows off his new “Douchebag Chic” style

ATLANTIC CITY, NJ -- Less than a week after announcing his retirement from boxing, Floyd Mayweather, Jr. once again reiterated to SSNN that he is done with the sweet science. [continue reading...]

Posted on June 12th, 2008

Chicago’s newest sex symbol – Sweet Lou

Sweet Lou takes a sexy walk to the mound.

CHICAGO, IL -- Lost in the shuffle of Cedric Benson being an idiot, Ozzie Guillen's frequent rants and a perennial loser owning the best record in Major League Baseball, an [continue reading...]

Posted on June 11th, 2008

Soriano hoping to buy AT&T Park’s enormous glove

SAN FRANCISCO, CA -- Though they sit at just 25-34, thirteen games back of the league-leading Cubs, the San Francisco Giants have something that Chicago's NL franchise – or, more [continue reading...]

Posted on June 4th, 2008

Pedro challenges Don Zimmer to UFC fight

NEW YORK CITY, NY -- With rumors circulating about a possible retirement following the 2008-2009 MLB season, New York Mets pitcher Pedro Martinez gave a possible hint as to his [continue reading...]

Posted on May 22nd, 2008

After hot start, Cubs brace for inevitably tough times

CHICAGO, IL -- Nearing the 100th anniversary of their last World Series title, the Chicago Cubs have thus far defied the negative culture that has smothered the franchise for nearly [continue reading...]

Posted on May 18th, 2008

Cubs to sell stadium, team, fans as package deal

CHICAGO, IL -- After months of talks with an Illinois state agency have failed to produce a deal for Wrigley Field, the Tribune Company – led by CEO Sam Zell [continue reading...]

Posted on May 14th, 2008

NL Central teams petition to have games ended after eight innings

NEW YORK, NY – In an unprecedented move, management from four of the teams within the National League Central Division have petitioned MLB commissioner Bud Selig to allow their teams [continue reading...]

Posted on May 12th, 2008

Zambrano pre-orders Wii Fit

CHICAGO, IL -- After searching all morning for their star pitcher, the Chicago Cubs were relieved to find Carlos Zambrano at a local GameStop placing a pre-order for the Nintendo [continue reading...]

Posted on May 3rd, 2008

Cubs finally allow Fukudome’s interpreter to reveal 100-year title drought

Fukudome has an unpleasant surprise waiting for him…

CHICAGO, IL -- Sitting atop the NL Central with more than a month of baseball's regular season under their belt, Chicago Cubs management finally told Kosuke Fukudome's interpreter to explain [continue reading...]

Posted on May 1st, 2008

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