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Tony Romo Archives

Pacman Jones’ off-season workout to consist of “get[ting] my smoke on.”

DALLAS, TX—The disappointing end to the Dallas Cowboys’ season left many of the members of America’s Team™®© with the desire to work hard in the off-season, and come back better [continue reading...]

Posted on January 15th, 2009

Local man not really interested in trading places with Donovan McNabb

PHILADELPHIA, PA -- As the Philadelphia Eagles were sewing up their victory over the New York Giants, Simon Humphries noted that it must be nice to be Donovan McNabb. "I was [continue reading...]

Posted on January 14th, 2009

Trail Blazers to League: Pick up Miles and we’re telling on you

PORTLAND, OR—The Portland Trail Blazers have issued the direst of warnings to its fellow 29 teams: sign Darius Miles and we are so telling on you. Miles, who November 2006 [continue reading...]

Posted on January 10th, 2009

TO mad that people aren’t including him in stuff anymore

DALLAS, TX -- When Terrell Owens thought that Tony Romo and Jason Witten were re-making plays with the explicit purpose of not including him, it was the last straw. Owens [continue reading...]

Posted on December 21st, 2008

Tony Romo declares he’s “really into ginger ale”

DALLAS, TX -- Ever-quirky Dallas QB Tony Romo called a special team meeting Saturday to declare he's "really into ginger ale." "Tony asked me to gather everyone on the team for [continue reading...]

Posted on November 29th, 2008

TO declares Monday night performance “best three-catch game ever in NFL history”

IRVING, TX -- Terrell Owens brashly declared that his three-catch, 79-yard, two touchdown performance was the "best three catch performance ever in the history of the NFL." Owens caught [continue reading...]

Posted on September 17th, 2008

D-Wade possibly dating Jessica Simpson?

CHICAGO, IL -- After losing their 24th game in 25 tries on Thursday night, the Miami Heat are looking for any possible explanation for their struggles. The latest loss was especially [continue reading...]

Posted on February 15th, 2008

Garcia punk’d again

HONOLULU, HI -- Jeff Garcia is again reeling from having been publicly embarrassed by Ashton Kutcher on his television program, Punk'd. This time, Kutcher worked with NFC Pro Bowl quarterbacks Brett [continue reading...]

Posted on January 30th, 2008

‘Cowboys cheerleader tells Jessica Simpson to ’step off’

DALLAS, TX -- A Dallas Cowboys cheerleader is crying right now, but it’s for a totally different reason than T.O. Twenty-one year-old and two-year "Cowgirls" veteran Kandi Harris has publicly [continue reading...]

Posted on January 16th, 2008

Simpson’s “Ginormous bozangas” may have been distraction to Romo

IRVING, TEX - NFL commentators are providing a variety of analysis for the many probable reasons for the NY Giants 21-17 NFC [continue reading...]

Posted on January 14th, 2008

Romo dentist appointment comes at bad time for Cowboys

DALLAS, TX -- An irate Wade Phillips, barely able to hold his tongue, told assembled media that Tony Romo's three-hour dental appointment Friday "could have had better timing." "In [continue reading...]

Posted on January 11th, 2008

Cowboys set to play Panthers without Barber

CHARLOTTE, NC -- The Dallas Cowboys are playing a crucial road game this weekend, but will be doing so without Marion Barber III, who missed the team plane and will [continue reading...]

Posted on December 22nd, 2007

Romo blames bad thumb on crazy night with Jessica Simpson

DALLAS, TX -– Contradicting reports that he suffered a thumb injury during last weekend's game against the Eagles, Cowboys QB Tony Romo told reporters that the injury actually occurred during [continue reading...]

Posted on December 20th, 2007

Green Bay loses to Dallas; Favre tells Romo to “Find a new mentor”

DALLAS, TX -- "Disgusted." That was the singular phrase that an injured and emotionally battered Brett Favre used to describe Tony Romo's four-touchdown performance against the Packers last night. "This is [continue reading...]

Posted on November 29th, 2007

Dallas Cowboys donated to President Bush in exchange for early end to presidency

DALLAS, TX -- In a heretofore unexpected and unprecedented event, the Dallas Cowboys have been given away to President George W. Bush, in exchange for a commitment that the president [continue reading...]

Posted on November 18th, 2007

Romo’s new contract requires him to sleep with Wade Phillips’ wife

DALLAS, TX -- The Dallas Cowboys agreed to a $67.5 million, six-year contract extension with quarterback Tony Romo this week. While the amount Romo stands to earn raised eyebrows around [continue reading...]

Posted on November 5th, 2007

Roger Goodell hands out suspensions in Ellen DeGeneres dog case

NEW YORK, NY -- The swift hand of NFL justice struck again this week, as Roger Goodell handed out a new round of suspensions in the Ellen DeGeneres/Iggy the dog [continue reading...]

Posted on November 1st, 2007

Romo: Bears’ Grossman "No Romo," but could be worse

CHICAGO, IL -- In a Tuesday interview with SSNN following the Cowboys 34-10 thrashing of the Chicago Bears, Tony Romo gave opposing quarterback Rex Grossman a [continue reading...]

Posted on September 25th, 2007

Owens, Glenn, Barber, and Cowboys D jealous of Romo for choking more

SEATTLE, WA -- Several members of the Dallas Cowboys expressed serious anger toward quarterback Tony Romo for out-choking them during the Cowboys' 21-20 playoff loss to the Seattle Seahawks. "Look, it [continue reading...]

Posted on January 7th, 2007

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