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San Diego Chargers Archives

Devastated Phillip Rivers likely out for game against Steelers after Perry-McCoy breakup

A broken-hearted Phillip Rivers reacts to the breakup between Perry and Barker

SAN DIEGO, CA -- The news hit Phillip Rivers like a gunshot wound to the abdomen; it rocked his gentle spirit and broke his delicate heart. It was 3 pm Tuesday [continue reading...]

Posted on January 6th, 2009

Big Ben recites alphabet up to F; doctors pronounce condition “excellent”

PITTSBURGH, PA—The Steel City has been holding its breath this past week over fears that their pro-bowl quarterback Ben Roethlisberger might not be at full strength following his concussion—the third [continue reading...]

Posted on January 6th, 2009

Furious Manning blames MVP award for playoff loss

INDIANAPOLIS, IN—Peyton Manning joined a very exclusive and elite club on Friday, becoming only the second man ever to win three NFL MVP awards in the modern era, equaling the [continue reading...]

Posted on January 4th, 2009

Shanahan goes to NFL.com for first time ever Sunday night; discovers Broncos almost made playoffs

DENVER, CO -- Upon returning to his house in the suburbs of Denver after a crushing defeated at the hands of the San Diego Chargers, Mike Shanahan couldn't sleep, so [continue reading...]

Posted on December 29th, 2008

Cutler misses crucial practice when stuck in line buying fleece throws at Old Navy (for only $3!)

DENVER, CO -- Broncos starting quarterback Jay Cutler took a personal day Tuesday, blowing off a crucial practice so he could shop at Old Navy. "I was on my Twitter this [continue reading...]

Posted on December 23rd, 2008

Londoners have absolutely no clue what happened in last 20 seconds of NFL game

LONDON, ENGLAND—American football may have gained more than a few fans this past weekend with the Chargers-Saints matchup at Wembley Stadium in London. The game was well-received by fans on [continue reading...]

Posted on October 29th, 2008

LT admits he can find London on a map, is derided by teammates

LONDON, ENGLAND—The lead-up to the Chargers-Saints match up in London on Sunday has led to many amusing cross-cultural exchanges between football’s finest and the British public. None have been more [continue reading...]

Posted on October 23rd, 2008

Bush convenes Congress to figure out who he should start between LT2, Ronnie Brown, and Frank Gore

WASHINGTON, DC -- President George W. Bush made an extremely unorthodox and frankly unprecedented move in the annals of American history Saturday, calling both houses of Congress together for an [continue reading...]

Posted on October 4th, 2008

Favres forgot to cancel Monday Night Football party

KILN, MS -- Dozens of friends of Brett and Deanna Favre were puzzled Monday when they arrived at the Favre residence for a Monday Night Football viewing party, only to [continue reading...]

Posted on September 22nd, 2008

Shawne Merriman cleared to play after fifth opinion from Dr. Dre

SAN DIEGO, CA -- Shawne Merriman has been officially cleared to play this weekend after seeking a fifth and final medical opinion from Dr. Dre. "I went to four doctors, and [continue reading...]

Posted on September 5th, 2008

Multi-faceted surgery on Rivers successful

SAN DIEGO, CA -- San Diego Chargers quarterback Philip Rivers underwent successful surgery Wednesday, having his torn ACL repaired. In an effort they described as "killing two birds with one [continue reading...]

Posted on January 24th, 2008

Obsessed Chargers fan spurs Rotoworld to record traffic day

LA JOLLA, CA -- The staff of popular fantasy sports website Rotoworld is rejoicing today, as 19-year-old San Diego suburbanite Jason Dawson single-handedly spurred the site to a record [continue reading...]

Posted on January 17th, 2008

Archie Manning buys tickets to wrong game

NEW ORLEANS, LA -- Archie Manning is out several thousand dollars after mistakenly buying plane and game tickets for this Sunday's game in Foxboro, Mass. Between the Patriots and Chargers, [continue reading...]

Posted on January 17th, 2008

Peyton Manning experiencing really weird feelings toward brother Eli

INDIANAPOLIS, IN – Peyton Manning reported this week that he’s feeling some really unusual feelings directed at his brother Eli, including some feelings that he’s never felt toward Eli before [continue reading...]

Posted on January 16th, 2008

Rivers still shocked he didn’t throw away Colts game

SAN DIEGO, CA -- It's been nearly a week since the Chargers defeated the Colts, but San Diego quarterback Philip Rivers still can't believe that – given the opportunity – [continue reading...]

Posted on November 15th, 2007

Manning throws four more picks while filming commercial

INDIANAPOLIS, IN -- Peyton Manning, who was recently bitten by the interception bug, threw four more picks today while attempting to complete a touchdown pass during the filming of a [continue reading...]

Posted on November 13th, 2007

Spencer from The Hills makes anti-fantasy football comments, solidifies title as ‘biggest douche ever’

HOLLYWOOD HILLS, CA -- Spencer Pratt, long established as the biggest douche in modern America, has reportedly clinched the title as biggest douche in human history after making a [continue reading...]

Posted on November 5th, 2007

Adrian Peterson wins New York Marathon

NEW YORK, N.Y.--A surprise entrant in Sunday's New York Marathon ended up winning the whole thing, as Adrian "Thesaurus" Peterson edged out Martin Lel of Kenya and Morroccan Abderrahim [continue reading...]

Posted on November 4th, 2007

Patriots send extra videotape to NFL, prove cheating did not help

FOXBORO, MA -- When the NFL receives the series of tapes that the New England Patriots are sending them as part of the spygate scandal, there will be one extra [continue reading...]

Posted on September 17th, 2007

“Great start” to Turner era in SD

SAN DIEGO, CA -- San Diego Chargers General Manager A.J. Smith said today that his relationship with new head coach Norv Turner is “off to a great start.” Turner [continue reading...]

Posted on February 20th, 2007