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Philadelphia Eagles Archives

Andy Reid to start Kevin Kolb on fantasy team

JACKSONVILLE -- In a surprise decision, a visibly concerned Andy Reid has announced that he'll be starting Kevin Kolb as his second quarterback in his fantasy game today, and leaving [continue reading...]

Posted on September 26th, 2010

Roger Goodell frantically searching for Ashton Kutcher

NEW YORK -- Roger Goodell was spotted late Tuesday anxiously roving the halls of NFL headquarters, screaming "Where the hell is Ashton?!" over and over, after the NFL commissioner revealed [continue reading...]

Posted on February 18th, 2009

Cardinals move up to seventh in ESPN’s latest power rankings

BRISTOL, CT -- Sunday's release of the ESPN.com's latest NFL power rankings saw the Arizona Cardinals make a big jump to seventh, while the Miami Dolphins and Minnesota Vikings took [continue reading...]

Posted on January 25th, 2009

Local man not really interested in trading places with Donovan McNabb

PHILADELPHIA, PA -- As the Philadelphia Eagles were sewing up their victory over the New York Giants, Simon Humphries noted that it must be nice to be Donovan McNabb. "I was [continue reading...]

Posted on January 14th, 2009

Vikings blame weather for playoff loss

Tarvaris Jackson was negatively affected by the weather in the Metrodome on Sunday.

MINNEAPOLIS, MN -- Meeting the media after their disappointing 26-14 playoff loss to the Philadelphia Eagles, members of the Minnesota Vikings readily acknowledged the sloppiness of their game, but were [continue reading...]

Posted on January 5th, 2009

Donovan McNabb religiously abides by $10 limit in family gift exchange

McNabb happily sticks to the family’s $10 gift limit.

PHILADELPHIA, PA -- According to members of his family, Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb continues to be a stringent follower of the family's ten dollar limit in their yearly Christmas [continue reading...]

Posted on December 31st, 2008

Playboy Playmate named guest offensive coordinator for Philadelphia Eagles

PHILADELPHIA, PA – In a surprise move Friday, Philadelphia Eagles head coach Andy Reid named Kendra Wilkinson, fiancée of Eagles wide receiver Hank Baskett and star of TV’s The Girls [continue reading...]

Posted on December 20th, 2008

After studying rule book for entire second half, McNabb an expert on “free kicks”

BALTIMORE, MD -- Yesterday was not the best day of Donovan McNabb's career, as he was benched for the second half of the Eagles' 36-7 thrashing at the hands of [continue reading...]

Posted on November 24th, 2008

Following tie, Andy Reid seen making out with sister

PHILADELPHIA, PA — The City of Brotherly Love took a disturbing and literal turn today, when Eagles Head Coach Andy Reid was spotted making out with his sister on Broad [continue reading...]

Posted on November 23rd, 2008

McNabb also didn’t know what to do with weird brown thingamajig

PHILADELPHIA, PA -- Donovan McNabb revealed to reporters that he as stunned and amazed that NFL games could end in ties after Sunday's 13-13 deadlock against the Cincinnati Bengals. [continue reading...]

Posted on November 19th, 2008

McNabb makes startling admission, then announces candidacy for President of the United States in 2012

PHILADELPHIA, PA -- Sunday's post-game presser following the Philadelphia Eagles' 13-13 tie was a shocking one in Philly, to be sure, with almost all of the action centered around quarterback [continue reading...]

Posted on November 18th, 2008

Philly fans ready to be extra spiteful toward Donovan McNabb on Sunday

PHILADELPHIA, PA -- Now with their decades-old championship drought out of the way, Philadelphia fans are prepared to be extra spiteful toward Donovan McNabb this Sunday when the Eagles take [continue reading...]

Posted on October 31st, 2008

TO declares Monday night performance “best three-catch game ever in NFL history”

IRVING, TX -- Terrell Owens brashly declared that his three-catch, 79-yard, two touchdown performance was the "best three catch performance ever in the history of the NFL." Owens caught [continue reading...]

Posted on September 17th, 2008

Owens doesn’t want to talk about McNabb all the time; only 95 percent

IRVING, TX -- Terrell Owens informed local media today that he doesn't want to talk about Donovan McNabb and the Philadelphia Eagles all of the time leading up to the [continue reading...]

Posted on September 14th, 2008

Harrison seeks legal advice from Lewis, Simpson

Marvin’s just looking for a little help from Ray and O.J.

PHILADELPHIA, PA -- Under investigation regarding his involvement in a Philadelphia shooting, Indianapolis Colts' wide receiver Marvin Harrison is not taking any chances. An anonymous source close to the Pro Bowler [continue reading...]

Posted on June 29th, 2008

Specter wants Walsh indicted for teasing

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Although the video tapes he turned over to NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell proved that former Patriots' video assistant Matt Walsh had done nothing illegal, he may not [continue reading...]

Posted on May 16th, 2008

Romo blames bad thumb on crazy night with Jessica Simpson

DALLAS, TX -– Contradicting reports that he suffered a thumb injury during last weekend's game against the Eagles, Cowboys QB Tony Romo told reporters that the injury actually occurred during [continue reading...]

Posted on December 20th, 2007

Philadelphia Eagles fans charged with every unsolved crime in America

PHILADELPHIA, PA -- In a bizarre but rather stirring sequence of events, District Attorney Lon Chambers announced that the state of Pennsylvania will charge Philadelphia Eagles fans, as a collective [continue reading...]

Posted on November 20th, 2007

Lute Olson takes time off to deal with Andy Reid’s sons

TUCSON, AZ -- On Sunday, legendary college basketball coach Lute Olson announced that he will be taking time off to deal with the troubled sons of Eagles head coach Andy [continue reading...]

Posted on November 6th, 2007

Atlanta places franchise tag on Freddie the Falcon

ATLANTA, GA -- In light of recent dog-fighting allegations against star quarterback Michael Vick, the Atlanta Falcons have decided to shift their focus. In an attempt to hold on to [continue reading...]

Posted on July 22nd, 2007