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New Orleans Saints Archives
Furious Archie Manning sends loser sons to bed without dinner
OXFORD, MS—Recalling that his boys had promised “never to come home again without a Super Bowl championship” and saying that he had “never heard of such appalling underachievement”, an infuriated [continue reading...]
Posted on January 19th, 2009
Londoners have absolutely no clue what happened in last 20 seconds of NFL game
LONDON, ENGLAND—American football may have gained more than a few fans this past weekend with the Chargers-Saints matchup at Wembley Stadium in London. The game was well-received by fans on [continue reading...]
Posted on October 29th, 2008
LT admits he can find London on a map, is derided by teammates
LONDON, ENGLAND—The lead-up to the Chargers-Saints match up in London on Sunday has led to many amusing cross-cultural exchanges between football’s finest and the British public. None have been more [continue reading...]
Posted on October 23rd, 2008
Jeremy Shockey to miss 4-6 weeks with penis chapping
NEW ORLEANS, LA -- The New Orleans Saints revealed today that Jeremy Shockey will miss a month or more with hernia surgery, though sources close to the team report that [continue reading...]
Posted on September 23rd, 2008
Pretty much every stripper in New Orleans wants to get nailed by Jeremy Shockey
NEW ORLEANS, LA -- SSNN has learned that pretty much every stripper in New Orleans wants to get nailed by Jeremy Shockey pretty bad right now. "I gotta be honest, I [continue reading...]
Posted on August 28th, 2008
Confused Shockey thinks he was traded to the Dolphins
MIAMI, FL -- A giddy Jeremy Shockey arrived in Florida hours ago, his head spinning with excitement at the prospect of joining the Miami Dolphins and performing again in the [continue reading...]
Posted on July 22nd, 2008
Phone companies report record call volume over Joba
NEW YORK, NY -- Several leading cellular phone companies reported a record number of phone calls Friday, apparently due to the announcement that New York Yankees pitcher Joba Chamberlain will [continue reading...]
Posted on May 30th, 2008
Man arrested for sending threatening letters to NFL players
ORLANDO, FL -- A Florida man was arrested yesterday in Orlando after being identified as the sender of multiple menacing letters to approximately twenty NFL players – including Reggie Bush, [continue reading...]
Posted on May 13th, 2008
Raiders determined not to let McFadden interfere with 2009 draft plans
OAKLAND, CA -- Oakland Raiders coach Lane Kiffin told reporters today that first-round draft choice Darren McFadden will not be allowed to ruin the team's future plans by having a [continue reading...]
Posted on May 5th, 2008
Bush shines at USC pro day
LOS ANGELES, CA -- The USC Trojans held their annual Pro Day yesterday in hopes of attracting notice for players hoping to be picked in the upcoming NFL draft. However, [continue reading...]
Posted on March 14th, 2008
FROM THE ARCHIVES: Ahmadinejad works out for Saints at QB
Good thing Drew Brees turned it around after his early-season struggles, or the Saints and their fans might be cheering for Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. Not that he still wouldn't have been [continue reading...]
Posted on December 11th, 2007
Ahmadinejad works out for Saints at QB
NEW ORLEANS, LA -- The New Orleans Saints, struggling for an offensive spark that can propel the team into the win column, admitted today that they worked out Iranian President [continue reading...]
Posted on September 26th, 2007
Brees honored by Nagin, New Orleans
NEW ORLEANS, LA -- When the New Orleans Saints signed Drew Brees last year, few expected him to make the kind of impact he did over the course of his [continue reading...]
Posted on June 7th, 2007
Texans see 2007 draft class, ask for 2006 do-over
INDIANAPOLIS -- As the NFL Scouting Combine wears on, many teams are struggling to find prospects that fit their needs. The Texans, whose needs are as pressing and diverse as [continue reading...]
Posted on February 24th, 2007
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