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MVP Archives
Overly nice human being Chase Utley withdraws self from All-Star Game
PHILADELPHIA -- Chase Utley has withdrawn himself from the baseball All-Star Game on the grounds that he is getting too much positive attention, and that it would just be "so [continue reading...]
Posted on July 3rd, 2008
Pierce injures leg, unable to take out garbage
BOSTON, MA -- While Boston fans were celebrating their 17th NBA championship on Tuesday night, one of the key cogs from their latest championship squad was suffering déjà vu. Mere [continue reading...]
Posted on June 18th, 2008
Kobe demanding trade again after Game 4 loss
LOS ANGELES, CA -- During a spectacular regular season that ended with the Lakers in the top spot in the Western Conference, and a playoff run that landed them in [continue reading...]
Posted on June 14th, 2008
Suns future in doubt after Shaq steps on Nash
PHOENIX, AZ -- Just when it seemed that things couldn't get any worse for the Phoenix Suns – they did. After making a late-season deal to acquire center Shaquille O'Neal from [continue reading...]
Posted on May 27th, 2008
Garnett apologizes to Celtics fans for “uncharacteristic” post-season performance
BOSTON, MA -- After helping his Celtics demolish the eighth-seeded Atlanta Hawks in game one of the their first-round NBA playoff series, a tearful Kevin Garnett apologized to fans for [continue reading...]
Posted on April 22nd, 2008
Waitress feels stupid after realizing Prince Fielder is not actually heir to any crown
PHOENIX, AZ -- Phoenix waitress Angela Lariano is feeling ashamed today, after she slept with Prince Fielder because she mistakenly believed the 250-lb. slugger was a real member of a [continue reading...]
Posted on February 25th, 2008
New, foolproof system developed to predict Super Bowl winner
CAMBRIDGE, MA -- A group of Harvard grad students, who claimed to have found a foolproof system for predicting football scores, may have experienced some setbacks. The group of young [continue reading...]
Posted on January 18th, 2008
One game left: Manning shifts focus to Pro Bowl
A frustrated Peyton Manning blamed his first Super Bowl win on Rex Grossman, and then lashed out at his Pro Bowl teammates for celebrating too early. "What are you doing?" Manning [continue reading...]
Posted on January 1st, 2008
A-Rod finalizes deal with Yankees for $252M, Montana
NEW YORK, NY -- Alex Rodriquez cemented his place, at least for now, in sports history as the highest paid contracted player in any sport when he finalized terms of [continue reading...]
Posted on December 18th, 2007
[CONTINUED] Kobe agrees to Bulls trade only if he gets to be renamed “Michael Jordan”
Page 1 | Page 2 "I'm thrilled to be back with the Bulls, going for my tenth title," said Michael Jordan, in a press conference held recently. "I [continue reading...]
Posted on November 3rd, 2007
Kobe agrees to Bulls trade only if he gets to be renamed “Michael Jordan”
LOS ANGELES, CA and CHICAGO, IL--After weeks of speculation, Kobe Bryant has agreed to be traded to the Chicago Bulls, but with an unusual stipulation. "The Bulls are ecstatic to announce [continue reading...]
Posted on November 3rd, 2007
Pierce: new Celtics “too intense”
BOSTON, MA -- Though the preseason is nary a couple of weeks old, the grumbling has already started in Boston, led by veteran Paul Pierce. "This team has gotten [continue reading...]
Posted on October 29th, 2007
Pierce: new Celtics “too intense” [CONTINUED]
Back to Page 1 | Page 2 "KG talks about championships all the time, man," Pierce said. "It's a little annoying, to be honest. I mean, yeah, it's great to [continue reading...]
Posted on October 29th, 2007
Schilling might cut ankle to regain 2004 magic
BOSTON, MA -- Following last Saturday's sub-par performance against Cleveland, Curt Schilling is looking for answers. After shutting down the Angels in the opening playoff series, Schilling struggled with his [continue reading...]
Posted on October 18th, 2007
Alex Rodriguez to become singles hitter, will work on it during playoffs
BRONX, NY -- Yankees third baseman and surefire 2007 MVP Alex Rodriguez has decided that he's going to become a spray hitter in 2008, and will work on [continue reading...]
Posted on September 19th, 2007
MLB still toying with All-Star format
SAN FRANCISCO, CA -- In 2003, Major League Baseball adopted the slogan "This Time It Counts" for the All-Star Game, after the previous year's game resulted in a tie. Commissioner [continue reading...]
Posted on July 10th, 2007
Nowitzki loses MVP trophy
DALLAS, TX -- In an apparent attempt to shake his "choker" label, Dirk Nowitzki announced a tournament earlier this week where the winner would receive his 2006-07 Most Valuable Player [continue reading...]
Posted on May 17th, 2007
Justin Morneau has only 34 friends on MySpace
MINNEAPOLIS, MN -- Reigning American League MVP Justin Morneau is dismayed that, despite his rise in popularity and his MVP award, his MySpace page has failed to generate him the [continue reading...]
Posted on January 4th, 2007
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