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Chicago White Sox Archives

Delmon Young apparently thinks today’s game decides the World Series championship

CHICAGO -- An apparently confused Delmon Young arrived at U.S. Cellular Field convinced that today's one-game playoff between the White Sox and the Twins will decide the 2008 Major League [continue reading...]

Posted on September 30th, 2008

White Sox’ Ozzie Guillen proposes to “swap teams” with Twins’ Ron Gardenhire

MINNEAPOLIS, MN -- Following a crushing defeat in the third game of a three-game sweep that vaulted the Minnesota Twins into first place in the AL central, Ozzie Guillen made [continue reading...]

Posted on September 26th, 2008

White Sox star Carlos Quentin injured while being treated for injury

CHICAGO, IL – Only days after the Chicago White Sox suffered a potentially fatal blow to their season at the hands of the poor decision-making skills of star Carlos Quentin, [continue reading...]

Posted on September 8th, 2008

Baseball owners want to use instant replay to review Selig hiring

If owners have their way, Selig’s hiring could be overturned by instant replay.

NEW YORK, NY -- As the professional baseball owners gather to consider instant replay, SSNN has learned that many of the owners are interested in using the technology to take [continue reading...]

Posted on August 19th, 2008

Harden invites teammates to view WALL-E

Rich Harden loves allegorical animated films.

CHICAGO, IL -- In what he hoped would be a team-building exercise that would let his teammates get to know him a bit better, Rich Harden invited several Cubs teammates [continue reading...]

Posted on August 6th, 2008

Ken Griffey tears hamstring

Griffey hit the shelf before he ever got to the field for the Sox.

CHICAGO, IL -- In what can only be described as a freak accident, new Chicago White Sox centerfielder Ken Griffey, Jr. has torn his hamstring before ever setting foot on [continue reading...]

Posted on August 1st, 2008

Rangers to sponsor “Josh Hamilton Night” in Arlington

Hamilton once loved cocaine, but now sticks to nasty chewing tobacco…

ARLINGTON, TX -- The Texas Rangers sent out a press release early Monday announcing that the Friday, July 11 home game against the Chicago White Sox has officially been designated [continue reading...]

Posted on June 30th, 2008

Twins defect to NL, lead West division by four games

Mauer spearheaded the Twins’ move to the NL West

MINNEAPOLIS, MN -- In what has been called a daring midnight escape, the entire Minnesota Twins organization defected from the gray, dreary American League Central to the sunny climes of [continue reading...]

Posted on June 28th, 2008

Major League managers pay tribute to Carlin

Some MLB managers stole this facial expression from Carlin, too

CHICAGO, IL -- The death of actor/comedian George Carlin has not only had an effect on the entertainment community, but the sports community as well. The stand-up legend's influence was [continue reading...]

Posted on June 24th, 2008

Konerko heads to DL, Chicago rejoices

Konerko may be unhappy, but Sox fans are pumped!

CHICAGO, IL -- There was a distinct buzz in the air around the South Side of Chicago Tuesday, after White Sox first baseman Paul Konerko was placed on the 15-day [continue reading...]

Posted on June 17th, 2008

Guillen says “fuck it,” pencils self into lineup

Guillen is making some changes for Wednesday

CHICAGO, IL -- Chicago White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen has taken yet another bizarre step in his managerial tenure: he says he will be in the starting lineup for Wednesday's [continue reading...]

Posted on June 4th, 2008

Stern denies funny business in Draft Lottery

Stern is fed up with conspiracy theorists…

CHICAGO, IL -- After the Chicago Bulls' unlikely acquisition of the first overall pick in Tuesday night's NBA Draft Lottery, conspiracy theories have been shouted from the rooftops in Miami, [continue reading...]

Posted on May 21st, 2008

Dead cardinal, white sock found under Bartman’s seat at Wrigley

CHICAGO, IL -- Maybe Wrigley Field is cursed after all. Days after a Boston Red Sox fan who was working construction on the new Yankee Stadium buried a Red Sox [continue reading...]

Posted on April 15th, 2008

Guillen to take cue from South Park, get V-chip installed

TUCSON, AZ -- A V-chip is a system whereby parents can block out television programs they deem inappropriate for their children. In baseball terms, it can now be applied to [continue reading...]

Posted on March 27th, 2008

Williams trying desparately to trade for Gonzalez

CHICAGO, IL -- Reports out of Chicago late Thursday indicated that White Sox GM Kenny Williams is burning up the phone lines, trying to pry Gio Gonzalez away from the [continue reading...]

Posted on January 4th, 2008

FROM THE ARCHIVES: Clemens conspiracy uncovered

As you try to make sense of the video that Roger Clemens posted on his website today, denying all use of performance enhancing drugs, just remember that he's lied to [continue reading...]

Posted on December 23rd, 2007

FROM THE ARCHIVES: A-Rod torturing Jeter over dinner tab

As A-Rod prepares himself for an offseason of criticism and mockery, we pile on with a classic from earlier this year. BRONX, NY -- Citing an agonizingly annoying three months, [continue reading...]

Posted on November 12th, 2007

Rockies extend winning streak

DENVER, CO -- The National League champion Colorado Rockies continued their red-hot ways on Tuesday, extending their winning streak to 12 games, and winning 23 of their last 24 as [continue reading...]

Posted on October 17th, 2007

Thome just happy 500^th homer wasn’t boring

CHICAGO, IL -- Jim Thome's walk-off 500th homer left the Sunday afternoon U.S. Cellular field crowd in hysterics, the White Sox victorious, and the slugging superstar relieved."I just [continue reading...]

Posted on September 17th, 2007

Thome sees Ratatouille for the fourth time in the theater

JOLIET, IL -- A recent White Sox off-day allowed Jim Thome the opportunity to spend the afternoon out in public, taking in the Pixar movie Ratatouille – by himself. [continue reading...]

Posted on September 7th, 2007

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