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Chicago Cubs Archives

Mayweather still insists he’s retired

Mayweather shows off his new “Douchebag Chic” style

ATLANTIC CITY, NJ -- Less than a week after announcing his retirement from boxing, Floyd Mayweather, Jr. once again reiterated to SSNN that he is done with the sweet science. [continue reading...]

Posted on June 12th, 2008

Chicago’s newest sex symbol – Sweet Lou

Sweet Lou takes a sexy walk to the mound.

CHICAGO, IL -- Lost in the shuffle of Cedric Benson being an idiot, Ozzie Guillen's frequent rants and a perennial loser owning the best record in Major League Baseball, an [continue reading...]

Posted on June 11th, 2008

Soriano hoping to buy AT&T Park’s enormous glove

SAN FRANCISCO, CA -- Though they sit at just 25-34, thirteen games back of the league-leading Cubs, the San Francisco Giants have something that Chicago's NL franchise – or, more [continue reading...]

Posted on June 4th, 2008

Pedro challenges Don Zimmer to UFC fight

NEW YORK CITY, NY -- With rumors circulating about a possible retirement following the 2008-2009 MLB season, New York Mets pitcher Pedro Martinez gave a possible hint as to his [continue reading...]

Posted on May 22nd, 2008

After hot start, Cubs brace for inevitably tough times

CHICAGO, IL -- Nearing the 100th anniversary of their last World Series title, the Chicago Cubs have thus far defied the negative culture that has smothered the franchise for nearly [continue reading...]

Posted on May 18th, 2008

Cubs to sell stadium, team, fans as package deal

CHICAGO, IL -- After months of talks with an Illinois state agency have failed to produce a deal for Wrigley Field, the Tribune Company – led by CEO Sam Zell [continue reading...]

Posted on May 14th, 2008

NL Central teams petition to have games ended after eight innings

NEW YORK, NY – In an unprecedented move, management from four of the teams within the National League Central Division have petitioned MLB commissioner Bud Selig to allow their teams [continue reading...]

Posted on May 12th, 2008

Zambrano pre-orders Wii Fit

CHICAGO, IL -- After searching all morning for their star pitcher, the Chicago Cubs were relieved to find Carlos Zambrano at a local GameStop placing a pre-order for the Nintendo [continue reading...]

Posted on May 3rd, 2008

Cubs finally allow Fukudome’s interpreter to reveal 100-year title drought

Fukudome has an unpleasant surprise waiting for him…

CHICAGO, IL -- Sitting atop the NL Central with more than a month of baseball's regular season under their belt, Chicago Cubs management finally told Kosuke Fukudome's interpreter to explain [continue reading...]

Posted on May 1st, 2008

Mixed reactions for Cubs hot start

CHICAGO, IL -- One would think that after a 15-7 start by the perennial doormat know as the Chicago Cubs, spirits would be high on the North Side of the [continue reading...]

Posted on April 25th, 2008

Dusty Baker promises to limit Cueto, Volquez, Bailey to 150 pitches per start

CINCINNATI, OH -- Dusty Baker has been criticized in the past for overusing young arms on his pitching staff. Not this time, he says. The Reds have some very good young [continue reading...]

Posted on April 24th, 2008

Cubs win 10,000^th meaningless game

DENVER, CO -- The Chicago Cub's dramatic tenth-inning victory over the Colorado Rockies Wednesday night was more than just an early-season morale booster, it was one for the record books: [continue reading...]

Posted on April 24th, 2008

Cubs fan leader fires back at Brennaman

CHICAGO, IL -- Cincinnati Reds broadcaster Marty Brennaman did not have pleasant things to say about fans of the Chicago Cubs, calling them "far and away the most obnoxious fans [continue reading...]

Posted on April 23rd, 2008

Dead cardinal, white sock found under Bartman’s seat at Wrigley

CHICAGO, IL -- Maybe Wrigley Field is cursed after all. Days after a Boston Red Sox fan who was working construction on the new Yankee Stadium buried a Red Sox [continue reading...]

Posted on April 15th, 2008

Bear survives Zambrano attack

CHICAGO, IL -- The day began innocently as Carlos Zambrano, along with Cubs teammates Aramis Ramirez and Derrek Lee, took advantage of an off day to go camping and fishing [continue reading...]

Posted on April 10th, 2008

Zambrano’s cats not taking to Cat Genie

CHICAGO, IL -- Flipping through the channels late on a Saturday night during spring training, Cubs pitcher Carlos Zambrano stumbled on an infomercial for Cat Genie, the self-cleaning litter box. [continue reading...]

Posted on April 7th, 2008

Fukudome spends all night preparing appeal for Cubs kangaroo court

TUCSON, AZ -- Kosuke Fukudome was exhausted this morning, after spending the entire night in the University of Arizona law library studying the American legal system in preparation for a [continue reading...]

Posted on March 27th, 2008

Zambrano fascinated by blinking blue light

CHICAGO, IL -- In what will undoubtedly go down as a pivotal moment in his life, Carlos Zambrano woke up this morning to find a glowing blue light coming from [continue reading...]

Posted on March 25th, 2008

Zambrano obsessed with new Macbook Air song

MESA, AZ -- Spring training means different things to different players. For Chicago Cubs ace Carlos Zambrano, this year was all about learning the words to his new favorite song. "Big [continue reading...]

Posted on March 22nd, 2008

Cubs outfielder Pie exhibiting signs of severe separation anxiety

PHOENIX, AZ -- The Cubs are facing some major personnel decisions in the next few weeks, and one of the biggest questions deals with whether they ought to install Felix [continue reading...]

Posted on March 17th, 2008

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