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Chad Johnson Archives
Ocho Cinco says willingness to be deactivated shows he’s a team player
CINCINNATI, OH -- On the day when his commitment to football and the Bengals might have been called into the most question, Chad Ocho Cinco was adamant that he'd actually [continue reading...]
Posted on November 24th, 2008
Palin’s clothing spree includes $84,000 worth of Chad Johnson jerseys
CINCINNATI, OH -- Many were outraged this week when it was discovered the GOP vice presidential nominee had spent $150,000 on new clothing since her selection to the ticket. However, all [continue reading...]
Posted on October 24th, 2008
Johnson injures mouth, mute 3-4 weeks
CINCINNATI, OH -- Cincinnati Bengals' publicity-seeking star wideout Chad Johnson severely burned his tongue and lips on what is being called "a particularly hot papaya" before his team's preseason game [continue reading...]
Posted on August 20th, 2008
Ovechkin wants Russian women only - DA!
Goodbye, Ocho Cinco....HELL-O, Sashen'ka Ovechkin! My new favorite athlete is even more hilarious-er than Chad, pretty cute despite the missing teeth, and he's looking for a Russian wife. OOO, ooo! Pick [continue reading...]
Posted on August 14th, 2008
Johnson admits he just doesn’t know how to tie his shoes
CINCINNATI, OH -- Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson finally showed up at Bengals headquarters last week to participate in the team's "optional" mini-camp, but things were not all rosy [continue reading...]
Posted on June 15th, 2008
Chad Johnson requests trade to Dallas
CINCINNATI, OH -- In yet another twist to the epic drama that is Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson, the disgruntled star has named the team he wants to be [continue reading...]
Posted on April 25th, 2008
Chris Long, Jake Long plan identity switcheroo at draft
NEW YORK CITY, NY -- OT Jake Long of Michigan and DE Chris Long of Virginia, rumored to be the first two picks of this year's NFL Draft, are planning [continue reading...]
Posted on April 25th, 2008
Johnson surprised to learn cheerleader he proposed to leaving Bengals
CINCINNATI, OH -- After being blindsided last week by the news that fellow Bengal receiver Chris Henry had been released by the team following the latest in his long string [continue reading...]
Posted on April 9th, 2008
Disgruntled Ocho Cinco to help team, involve governor in celebration
CINCINNATI, OH -- After not-so-subtly campaigning for a trade up and down press row at Super Bowl XLII, Chad Johnson was none too pleased to wake up on the Monday [continue reading...]
Posted on February 11th, 2008
Carson Palmer’s fantasy team puts up second-highest point total of week, loses
CINCINNATI, OH -- Carson Palmer fell victim to the bane of every fantasy footballer's existence Sunday when his team, Mr. October Gonzalez, scored 142.49 points, second highest total in his [continue reading...]
Posted on September 18th, 2007
Goodell praises Browns, Bengals for ingenuity
CLEVELAND, OH -- Both the victorious Cleveland Browns and the losing Cincinnati Bengals received phone calls of praise from NFL commissioner Roger Goodell following Sunday's 51-45 shootout. "At first, when I [continue reading...]
Posted on September 17th, 2007
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