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Hot Topics: MLB NFL NBA New York Yankees steroids baseball ESPN Chicago Cubs NCAA football NCAA basketball
News Item
GREEN BAY, WI- Brett Favre’s desire to come out of retirement has been attributed to his burning competitive desire, but a recent anonymous tip has made the already uncomfortable situation even more awkward and bizarre.
A housekeeper who worked at the Favre’s Mississippi home was recently fired and provided new insight into events unfolding in the NFL drama. Brett Favre has mistakenly been taking medication for menopause rather than his regular rounds of horse tranquilizers.
“Everything was fine until about a month ago when I found empty bottles of Imipamine and various other serotonin reuptake inhibitors in the trash,” the housekeeper said. “One day he sees me playing with the family dog, accuses me of trying to steal the dog’s affection, and fires me.”
Apparently, the famed football player has been taking the medication in amounts previously unknown, a common practice known in the football profession. His new psyche has been causing headaches for the Packers, who are trying to move on to quarterback Aaron Rodgers.
“One day I was at home watching television and I see the report that Favre is going to comeback on Sportscenter,” Rodgers said. “I though we were friends and expected him to at least call before he made any announcement. I feel hurt and betrayed, but I am kind of excited to be able to relate to his girlfriend when she talks about her friendemies.”
Other quarterbacks around the league feel equally hurt by Favre’s decision. Tony Romo of the Dallas Cowboys was ready to take over as the NFL’s gunslinger. New York Giants quarterback Eli Manning is not looking forward listening to fans with Giants tickets scream that the team should have traded for Favre after he has his obligatory regression game.
Other teams do not mind so much. The Chicago front office is happy to have at least one real quarterback to step onto the field for fans with Bears tickets.
“Everybody in Chicago is really excited by our defense this year, we have Urlacher returning,” Bears General Manager Jerry Angelo said. “We were a little worried that fans would be upset without a real starting quarterback on the field, but with Favre returning we can hope for the Bears-Packers game to have one side with a capable professional.”
It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!
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