Obama wears Bernard King jersey to White House; has to turn it inside out

WASHINGTON, DC — An attempt to forge some solidarity with his new neighbors backfired for President-elect Barack Obama this week, when he was forced to turn inside-out the throwback Bernard King Washington Bullets jersey he chose to wear to the White House.

“Like so many public schools and other holy houses throughout this great land, the White House will absolutely not tolerate t-shirts or apparel that promote illegal weapons, drug use, gang activity, or deviant sex,” said Horace Schmellman, director of protocol for the
White House. “This applies to future presidents and athletes both.”

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Schmellman noted that when the world champion Lakers used to visit the White House, “sleepy” Sam Perkins used to have to leave his marijuana cigarettes off the premises.

The trouble began when Obama arrived at the White House sporting the throwback jersey and was forced to turn it inside out, to mask the Bullets logo.

“They grabbed me outside and told me that I had to turn it inside out,” Obama said. “I couldn’t believe it! In this day and age. I
complied, because I am a good citizen. But I just want the peeps of DC to know that BO is with the Bullets, B, and there’s nothing you can do to stop it.”

Washington DC mayor Adrian Fenty was stoked about Obama’s interest in his new community, even if less ecstatic about the particular method of expression.

“I love it that he wants to be a part of DC, but it kind of gives people the wrong idea,” Fenty said. “That’s why they changed the name.
I just wish he would have worn something less offensive — like maybe a Redskins hat or something. A Dexter Manley throwback might have sent a nice message.”

Obama said that although he complied, he found the Bush administration’s interest in his clothing somewhat ironic.

“Um, Bush hates Bullets?” Obama said. “I’ve got ten billion reasons each month in Iraq that might make you rethink that.”