Brett Favre has (probably) played his last NFL game (we think)

NEW YORK — SSNN has (sort of) learned that (potentially) Brett Favre of the New York Jets is going to (maybe) retire from football and that the future Hall of Fame quarterback has played his last game (of the 2008 season).

“I have had a great career (which may or may not be over),” Favre said. “I am so proud of my accomplishments (and those to come) and will be looking forward to relaxing in my retirement (whenever that day officially comes).”

The New York Jets were supportive of Favre’s (whimsical) retirement announcement and have said they will support Favre in his (temporary plans for) retirement.

“It is with great sadness (and large amounts of disbelief) that we accept Brett’s announcement of retirement (which is non-binding),” said Jets owner Woody Johnson. “So much so that we are going to honor Brett by keeping a (quarterback) position for him available should he wish to stay with the Jets in some (quarterbacking) capacity. We are (not) excited to be moving on and (pretending to be) seeking a new quarterback for the future. We believe there are a lot of wonderful candidates (not named Brett Favre) who can quarterback our football team excellently in 2009, and we are excited to meet some of them (who we will ultimately not be able to employ due to Brett’s forthcoming return to football.”

NFL analyst Bill Cowher said that Favre’s career has been a wonderful(ly annoying) experience for NFL fans the past few years, and that we should treasure the time we (will) have with(out) Favre going forward.

“Brett Favre is one of the most amazing(ly self-centered, megalomaniacal, obnoxious) individuals in this great nation,” Cowher said. “We can all learn a lot from Brett about (in)decisiveness, (lack of) humility, and (un)dignified behavior. If everyone conducted themselves with Brett’s (in)elegance, just imagine where this great nation would be.”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!