Nats offer to $160 million to Teixeira LOL!! LMAO!

WASHINGTON, DC — The Washington Nationals have made an eight-year, $160 million contract to Angels first baseman Mark Teixeira, LOL!!!!

“Yeah, we totally offered a $160 million contract to Mark Teixeira, LOL, LMAO,” wrote Jim Bowden, GM of the Nationals, in an email to SSNN. “A HA HA HA HA $160 million LOL! We were thinking about making it ten years, $200 million, LOL, but we thought with it being Scott Boras, he might not get the joke.”

According to Bowden, the Nationals don’t have $160 million to spend.

“We were thinking about offering $16 million over eight years, but when I was typing up the offer, I accidentally put a zero in there, LOL, so I just thought, ‘Hey, what the hell, I’m never going to pay him this anyway, why not send it over and see what happens?’ So that’s what we did,” Bowden said.

Boras indicated that Teixeira is “seriously considering” the offer and that he is primarily interested in winning a World Series.

“Well, if that’s what Mark wants, then this is the perfect place for him, ROTFLMAO,” Bowden wrote. “LOL, he’s going to love it here in DC, with our winning attitude and approach! He’ll be a perfect fit. :-)”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!