Marc Bulger has decided to go on J-Date

ST. LOUIS, MO — St. Louis Rams starting QB Marc Bulger surprised teammates, media members and the Jewish community of greater St. Louis when he announced during his Wednesday press session that he intends to join J-Date, an online dating community for members of the Jewish faith.

“Am I Jewish? Not in the strictest literal sense, but I’ve been told I look the part,” Bulger said. “I figure if everyone thinks I’m Jewish, I might as well use that to nail some Jewish chicks, right?”

Bulger told SSNN that he believes his standing as a semi-successful athlete will go further with Jewish women than it currently does with the general population of the St. Louis area.

“Unfortunately, playing for the Rams doesn’t carry the weight it used to around here,” Bulger lamented. “But I’m thinking with the general lack of successful Jewish athletes, I can really impress the J-Date crowd just by being in the NFL at all.”

SSNN Judaism expert Schlomo Goldstein concurred with Bulger’s assessment.

“For an NFL quarterback, Marc is at best average — middle of the pack. As a Jewish athlete, on the other hand, he’s easily among the 50 greatest of all time in any sport,” Goldstein pointed out. “As far as selling the act, I would say his prominent proboscis and curly black hair should fool most Jews into accepting him, and the spelling of Marc with a ‘c’ should take care of the rest. It’s not as though they pull down your pants and check for circumcision when you sign up for J-Date.”

Bulger has not yet registered for the site, but says he hopes to take care of that process in advance of the Rams’ game against San Francisco on Sunday.

“I want to be all set up by the weekend, because I figure we’ve got a solid chance of hanging in there against the Niners and I could definitely capitalize on a win,” Bulger explained. “Hell, even if we don’t win I’ll have just played in an NFL game. With any luck, I’ll be knee deep in hot Jewish ‘tang by Monday afternoon.”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!