FOX trades NFL Robot for BCS Championship

NEW YORK, NY — It was announced earlier this month that the Fox network would not retain the rights to broadcast the BCS championship games for the 2010 and 2011 seasons, when they lost the rights to ESPN in a bidding war. Sports fans around the country were shocked at the development, and FOX took a lot of heat.

Soon thereafter, FOX executive Micheal Jenkins placed a call to Bristol.

“I figured maybe they would trade us for the BCS games,” Jenkins said. “They are a staple of our January programming. As a matter of fact that’s all people watch on Fox in January. (Besides House, of course).” After hours of negotiating the two sides reached a tentative trade agreement.

The trade would be as follows: Fox would receive the unconditional rights to broadcast all the BCS games in the near and distant future. ESPN will receive the following; Pam Oliver, The Fox Robot and the Jay Leno, Charles Barkley, Andy Rooney and Jim Rome impressions done by Frank Caliendo.

The two parties reportedly hit a snag in the negotiations when ESPN asked for Terry Bradshaw, and Fox wasn’t willing to part with him. “We settled for someone with about the same brain capacity as Bradshaw, by accepting the Fox Robot,” said Andrew Williams of ESPN.

When asked about the loss of four of Caliendo’s best impressions, Jenkins said “at least we still have Madden, that won’t get old fast, will it?”

The deal is pending the passing of the physical for Pam Oliver and the Fox Robot, soon to be known as the ESPN Robot.

ESPN feels it got the better end of the deal.

“Have you seen how popular the Fox Robot is?” William asked. “And have you seen how unpopular the BCS is? This was almost a no-brainer for us. The fact that they gave us stuff on top of the Fox Robot … well, let’s just say, I want some of whatever it is that they’re smoking.”

SSNN has not yet been able to confirm the rumors that Pam Oliver is planning on “beating the ever-loving shit out of Erin Andrews” as soon as she sets foot on the ESPN campus, but this is certainly a story that we will be watching. Obv.

Thanks to Aaron Siegel for the story.

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!