Aaron Rodgers attempting to celebtrate both Christmas and Hannukah

GREEN BAY, WI — Citing his obligation to represent the interests of “Wisconsin’s fine Jewish citizens,” Aaron Rodgers has announced that he’ll be celebrating both Christmas and Hannukah this year.

“I have learned a little bit about Hannukah this year, and a lot about leadership,” Rodgers said. “Both are miraculous aspects of life.”

Rodgers said he recently discovered that a distant relative on his mother’s side was in fact Jewish, and as such he has embraced the culture.

“In Judaism, if your grandfather’s third cousin twice-removed is Jewish, that basically makes you Jewish,” Rodgers said. “So it’s my responsibility to do my part and keep the spirit going. Haven’t our people suffered enough over the years, without your attempts at persecution and oppression?”

Rodgers said that his understanding of the dual celebrations means that he will get nine times as many presents as usual, and also get to eat nine spectacular feasts.

“That’s basically how it works,” Rodgers said. “We Jews just crush eight meals, and then I get my normal Christmas dinner as well. It’s gonna be a fun eight days!”

Rodgers other teammates have taken notice of his multi-religious approach to the season.

“Aaron keeps trying to strike up conversations with me about how everything is so Christmas-focused in the United States,” said running back Ryan Grant. “Every time I try and tell him that I am Christian and celebrate Christmas, he just hugs me and says ‘Happy Kwanzaa, bro. Happy Kwanzaa.’”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!