Subscribe To Our Site!

Hot Topics:

Main Menu

Home

About

Features

Submit

Facebook

MySpace

Friends

NSR

Contact

Mad-Libs

Archives

Gallery

Sponsors

Advertise

Subscribe

Jobs

SCNN

Pryzms

Go to Vividseats.com to get all hard-to-find Sports Tickets, including all NCAA Football Tickets , Basketball Tickets , Baseball Tickets , College Basketball Tickets , Tennis Tickets , PGA Tickets, NASCAR Tickets, NFL Tickets , and Super Bowl Tickets.

Get free NFL picks from PicksNFL.com
Wunderdog Sports is your source for football picks Get free football picks at TopTenCappers.com

Check out EnglishHarbour Network, the best and trusted online casino providing the online slots, table games and other casino games. Visit us for the best online gambling experience and great casino bonuses.

Cheap Sports Tickets
14 major suppliers
mega major $$$ deals
... Sports Ticket Depot.

TOUTHOUSE.COM
NFL Betting Predictions, Free NFL Picks and Current Football Odds

Brett Favre |New Curse

Ticket Solutions
Sports Tickets
NFL
Baseball
Super Bowl
World Series
NCAA Tournament

See the DC United Playoffs with MLS tickets. All your other favorite sports events tickets are also at RazorGator.

Cheap Premium Tickets.com
Get tickets to your favorite sporting events including New York Giants tickets, Pittsburgh Steelers tickets, Detroit Red Wings tickets, Los Angeles Lakers tickets, San Francisco Giants tickets and more.


Bush convenes Congress to figure out who he should start between LT2, Ronnie Brown, and Frank Gore

  • Digg
  • Google
  • StumbleUpon
  • del.icio.us
  • Facebook
  • Technorati
  • Furl
  • YahooMyWeb
  • Fark

WASHINGTON, DC — President George W. Bush made an extremely unorthodox and frankly unprecedented move in the annals of American history Saturday, calling both houses of Congress together for an emergency weekend session.

“I imagine that he’s calling us together to discuss the ramifications of the financial bailout plan,” said Sen. John McCain (R-AZ), who left the campaign trail for the emergency meeting. McCain was surprised to learn upon arriving in the nation’s capital that Bush had not called the meeting to discuss the financial bailout plan, as expected, but rather had done so to gain some crucial advice as to whom he should start this weekend in fantasy football.

“The nation is in turmoil,” President Bush said. “People are being forced to make decisions that they never thought they’d have to make. For some people, they have to decide if they’re going to buy gas for their car or groceries for their kids. For others, it’s medicine for their families or being able to send their children for school. For me, I have to decide whether to start Frank Gore or LT2 this weekend in my fantasy football league. These are truly unbelievable times.

“While LT2 is on the road,” Bush said, “he does have a great matchup against the Dolphins. And Frank the Tank, he’s at home, but the Patriots are coming into town. I don’t know, it’s a really difficult decision, and I’m not sure how I should proceed.”

Bush proposed that Congress take a vote on the matter, and that “majority rules.” He did indicate that he would maintain his veto power.

Visit SSNN on Facebook

Follow SSNN on Twitter

Many Congressmen and Senators expressed concern at Bush’s use of taxpayer monies and crucial time to make decisions about fantasy sports.

“Honestly, there’s got to be a better use of our time,” said Claire McCaskill, D-MO. “I mean, the nation is in crisis, and we’re talking about football? And not even real football — I’m pretty sure it’s fake football that we’re talking about here.”

Others agreed.

“Frankly, I think he convened us just so he could brag about the fact that one of those dudes is going to be on his bench this week,” said Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, D-NV. “It’s like, ‘Yeah, we get it, George, your team is awesome. Now please get back to trying to run the country?’”

Things have not always been so rosy for Bush on the fantasy front.

Bush made a series of extremely ill-advised, reckless decisions upon joining the league in 2000. In many cases, he committed to spending an extreme amount of money to ill-advised, unproven, or pointless players.

“He’s gotten lucky here and there,” Reid said. “In some cases, like Jay Cutler, it worked out, but more often than not he’s spending $74 a year on Domanick Davis for the next eight years. And you wonder why the economy is in shambles.”

If you’re new here, you may want to subscribe to our newsletter or RSS feed and get hilarious sports news every day. Thanks for visiting!

Labels: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Posted on October 4th, 2008

Subscribe To Our Site!

Got a headline idea? Click here to submit it... and be sure to visit our Facebook page!


Be the first to leave a comment on this story below...

You must be logged in to post a comment.


Search Our Site

  

Subscribe to SSNN's Newsletter

Enter your Email


Check Out These Classics

Multimedia News

Vertical Soccer


It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!

View Multimedia Archives...

Photo Gallery

Get the Flash Player to see the slideshow.

Visit our Gallery for a full listing of images...

Featured News

News In Brief

Get Free Sports Picks from: Doc - A 36 year veteran Robert Ferringo Strike Point Sports Allen Eastman Vegas Sports Informer

Want CHEAP sports tickets? From NASCAR tickets to WWE tickets, or Red Sox tickets, Final Four tickets to discount Super Bowl tickets, find great deals on all kinds of event tickets here.

Sports fans may not always be serious about their news, but they're serious about their tickets. For NBA Playoffs tickets or Raptors tickets in Toronto, or Cowboys tickets online, CTC has a serious selection of the best sports tickets on the web. Get NY Giants tickets and sold out Super Bowl tickets too!