Transcript of an audio recording capturing an exchange between Ken Whisenhunt and Kurt Warner of the Arizona Cardinals

[The following is an audio recording capturing an exchange between Arizona Cardinals head coach Ken Whisenhunt and Cardinals QB Kurt Warner]

Kurt Warner: “Hey coach…”

Ken Whisenhunt: “Hey Kurt, how’s it going?”

Kurt: “I’m good. Watcha doing?

Ken: “Drawing up some game plans.”

Kurt: “Am I in them?”

Ken: “I haven’t decided yet.”

Kurt: “Why haven’t you decided yet?”

Ken: “It’s a very difficult decision to make, Kurt.”

Kurt: “I don’t think it is.”

Ken: “Well, you’re wrong.”

[Pause]

Kurt: “Hey coach, between you and me, which of us do you like more, me or Matt [Leinart]?”

Ken: “I like you both equally.”

Kurt: “That’s not possible.”

Ken: “When you grow up, you’ll find it is.”

Kurt: “Let’s say a homicidal but highly principled maniac broke into training camp and kidnapped me and Matt. And he told you you had to choose which one of us he was going to kill. Who would you choose?”

Ken: “I wouldn’t be able to choose.”

Kurt : “If you don’t choose he kills us both.”

Ken: “I really don’t have time for this, Kurt.”

Kurt: “But you have to choose!”

Ken: “Kurt, I don’t know!”

Kurt: “You have to tell me!”

Ken: “Christ! Fine, if I tell you, will you go away?!”

Kurt: “Fine!”

Ken: “I would choose you, okay? Now would you—”

Kurt: “HAHA! I TOLD you!”

[Matt Leinart reveals himself at this moment]

Matt: “What the fuck?!”

Ken: “Matt?! Listen, I didn’t mean it, I just—”

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Kurt: “Yes you did! You said it! You said you’d kill Matt and not me!”

Ken: “I just said it so Kurt would go away, I don’t actually—”

Matt: “Shut up! I hate you! I hate you!” [A disconsolate and weeping Matt Leinart promptly flees the room]

Ken: “Goddammit! Are you happy now, Kurt? You just made Matt cry. I hope you’re pleased with yourself!”

Kurt: [Laughter]

[Tape ends]

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!