Rockies’ Taveras disappointed about possible demotion

DENVER, CO — Colorado Rockies general manager Dan O’Dowd has reportedly told outfielder Willy Taveras that he may be traded soon, with the most likely destination being an unaffiliated minor league club, the Washington Nationals.

“It’s always been a dream of mine to play for big league clubs, and I have that with the Rockies,” a disappointed Taveras told reporters this morning. I don’t feel like I need more time in the minors, especially with a double-A team like the Nationals.”

“The move makes sense for us,” Nats’ GM Jim Bowden said in an interview with SSNN. “Lastings Milledge wants to move to left, field because he wants the cameras to be able to focus on his ‘good side,’ and we’re not going to re-up our contract with Elijah Dukes’ babysitter, so he may be gone. We really need a legit center fielder… Or at least a guy we can stick out there who can approximate the caliber of play we’re getting elsewhere.”

“His low RBI totals and lack of power should fit nicely into our lineup,” Bowden went on. “His batting average recently crept above .260, but we don’t anticipate that being an issue once he’s got Austin Kearns behind him instead of Matt Holliday. He does steal a lot of bases, so we’ll have to see what we can do about slowing him down a little. Then again, it’s hard to steal if you’re never on base, right?”

A deal has not yet been finalized. Unsubstantiated rumors that Scott Podsednik could be in the mix have also surfaced.

“I’m happy where I’m at,” Taveras said to SSNN. “I love playing here at Coors, the Rockies fans, chasing down balls in the left center field gap when [Matt] Holliday misplays them, Todd Helton’s goatee. I’d miss it all if I were sent down to the Nationals.”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!