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Pirates sign Lyndon Larouche in effort to have all Laroches and LaRouches on team

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PITTSBURGH, PA — The Pittsburgh Pirates announced today that they are signing quadrennial presidential candidate Lyndon LaRouche, with the intention of amassing all living LaRoches/LaRouches on their roster. The invective spewing conspiracy theorist will join Adam and Andy Laroche, who man the corner infield positions. “Always nice to meet another Laroche,” said Andy. “I think Lyndon will really fit in here. We have a good young team developing.” Lyndon LaRouche, who is 86, will likely play second base, occasionally moving to shortstop to give Jack Wilson a night off. “The unchecked greed and dishonesty of the West will result in the end of American life as we know it,” LaRouche said. “Go Bucs!”

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Posted on August 2nd, 2008

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