“Manny being Manny” excuse infuriating to mother of 13-year-old Long Island boy

MANHASSET, NY — Rebecca Leiftowitz has had just about enough of her son Emmanuel “Manny” Leiftowitz’s antics, and his excuses are starting to wear thin as well.

“Emmanuel is such a sweet boy,” Rebecca told SSNN. “But for the last year or so, every time he doesn’t do something, or misbehaves in any fashion – which is becoming increasingly often – he doesn’t take responsibility for it. Instead, he just looks at me, shrugs, and says, ‘Manny being Manny!’ It’s really starting to piss me off.”

Things started to boil over recently when Emmanuel, 13, was supposed to be studying his haftorah portion in preparation for his upcoming bar mitzvah, scheduled for August 23.

“I came into the room, and instead of studying his haftorah, Emmanuel was on this Facebook website,” Rebecca said. “I was so mad! I asked him what he was doing, even though I already knew. To be honest, I was hoping he would lie to me and say that he was studying the haftorah on the computer, or something like that.

“But instead, he just smiled and said, ‘Manny being Manny! What can you do? Manny’s a free spirit.’ I grounded him for two weeks, that’s what I can do. Still, I don’t think it will be enough.”

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Apparently Emmanuel’s excuse-making extends to outside the home as well. The youngster recently used the same excuse to decline doing a reading assignment about the war »”>Civil War.

“Listen, I understand more than he thinks,” Rebecca said. “I know he’s trying to emulate his favorite baseball player, Manny Ramirez – Samuel, my husband, told me all about it. But you take one look at Manny Ramirez, and you realize that that guy really is a free spirit, with his crazy hair and loose pants. This little pisher who lives upstairs thinks he has the chutzpah to be like the real Manny Ramirez? He’s lucky if he can eat a blintze without spilling it all over his shirt!”

However, the lessons of Manny Ramirez’s life are not going unheeded by Rebecca. She has recently decided that she’s going to ship Emmanuel off to a new location, to see if a change of scenery will be good for what ails him.

“He’s going down to Boca Raton, and he’s going to spend a few weeks with his bubbe,” Rebecca said. “Hopefully some fresh air and homemade kugel will help Emmanuel straighten himself out.”