Baseball owners want to use instant replay to review Selig hiring

NEW YORK, NY — As the professional baseball owners gather to consider instant replay, SSNN has learned that many of the owners are interested in using the technology to take another look at the hiring of Commissioner Bud Selig over a decade ago.

“I think a lot of us would like to take another quick look at that call,” said Drayton McLane, owner of the Houston Astros. “You know, just to make sure we didn’t miss anything the first time through. Instant replay is about getting it right, no?”

Since taking over the commissioner’s job on a supposedly interim basis in 1992, Selig has presided over some of the most controversial times in baseball’s long, storied history. In addition to being a major figure in the sport’s steroid era, he was unable to avoid the strike in 1994 and is widely held responsible for the asinine ruling that gives home field advantage in the World Series to the league that wins the All-Star Game.

“Hell yeah I want a replay of the Selig hiring,” said one National League owner who spoke on condition of anonymity. “I could’ve killed him for that stupid All-Star Game rule. We’re never gonna have fucking home field advantage because of that stupid thing – the idiot put the NL behind the eight ball for the foreseeable future. I mean, what is that about?”

Owners are not certain how a reversal of the Selig hiring might be handled, but most think it is something that should at least be looked into. With the advent of instant replay in baseball, the consensus is that potentially incorrect decisions in the past should not simply be grandfathered into the new replay era.

“I’m not sure I can see a reason not to look back at things a little further in the past,” McLane told SSNN. “Is it any less important to make sure we made the right call on something that happened in 1998 [when Selig was officially named Commissioner] – or even ‘92 – than it is to make sure Carlos Lee’s dingers get over the yellow line? I certainly don’t think so.

“Plus if we overturn the Selig hiring, we can all happily write this steroid era nonsense right out of the record books. And also that embarrassing World Series loss to the White Sox.”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!