MLB players urge Canseco to concentrate on family, hobbies instead of finishing new book

MIAMI, FL — Nearly three years after Jose Canseco’s highly controversial book Juiced: Wild Times, Rampant ‘Roids, Smash Hits & How Baseball Got Big, the publishing world is abuzz with talk of a sequel – called Vindicated – due out soon.

While one would imagine that the ex-MVP’s friends and former teammates in major league baseball would support his future writing endeavors, most MLB players described themselves as having mixed feelings about the ex-outfielder penning another book.

Some describe themselves as “frightened,” or “deeply concerned,” while others simply wish the former 40-40 club member would focus on other areas of life – like family and recreation – rather than writing another book that would place their reputations and livelihoods in grave danger.

“Basically, what Jose needs to understand is that there’s more to life than writing tell-all exposés about major league baseball players engaging in highly illegal behavior, said Angels outfielder Torii Hunter. “Life is too short to spend all day in front of a dusty old computer. I really feel it’s important for Jose to get out more and do things. Anything, besides writing that book.”

Hunter’s concerns for his friend have even brought out his spiritual side. “I say a prayer every night that that Canseco will get out and spend time doing things besides putting the finishing touches on that new book.”

According to sources inside the league, Hunter’s prayer circle has expanded to include nearly every major league baseball player not named in Canseco’s first book, including many who had previously never believed in God.

“Sometimes matters are so important that they can only placed in God’s hands,” insists a suddenly pious Derek Jeter. “I just pray and pray that Jose thinks of something else to do. His family needs him, and I’m sure there are other things he could be doing besides publishing this Vindicated thing.”

In the meantime, Canseco’s concerned friends from the baseball world are content to check up on their old chum from time to time, with urgent voice messages and emails asking if he’s still going through with the book. Some have even enlisted the help of their lawyers to ensure that he spend his precious free time on things other than a sequel to ‘Juiced.’

“I just feel it’s important that Jose spend more time with his lovely family,” Hunter added. “If filing cease and desist orders and threatening multiple lawsuits is the only way to get him to enjoy the company of his two – or is it three? – sons or daughters or whatever, then so be it.”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!