Dibble convinced conspiracy led to Golden Tee tourney ouster

LOS ANGELES, CA — Best Damn Sports Show, Period personality Rob Dibble was noticeably absent from a live taping of the wildly popular show Wednesday evening, after the two-time All-Star relief pitcher stormed off the set because of an ugly incident involving fellow cast members earlier in the day.

According to on-looking BDSSP production personnel, Dibble became increasingly incensed amid suspicions his opponents were jointly conspiring against him in what was supposed to be a friendly tournament of Golden Tee Golf, the universally popular arcade game. After numerous shouting matches with good friend and co-star John Salley, Dibble reportedly tipped over the gaming console, and yelled strings of expletives as he made his way out of the building.

“This whole tournament thing was supposed to be a fun, something to further enhance cohesiveness amongst the crew. At first, it was really a lot of fun, and we were all into it. Charissa Thompson even wore a little cheerleader number while she played; all I can say is ‘Damn, that girl looked good,’” Salley gushed. “But I think it’s an understatement to say none of us thought it would turn into Dibble tearing off his shirt, pounding his chest like a damn ape and verbally undressing Chris Rose in front of everyone.

“I wish I could tell you what set him off. If I had to take a stab at it, I’d go out on a limb and say it was me repeatedly whispering in his ear that he would have won a few more World Series had he taken steroids while with the Reds.”

Rose, the program’s host, admits all involved agreed to heckle one another in order to make the game more engaging, but also says he thought the good-natured shenanigans would merely serve as an extension of the camaraderie the four share both on and off the set.

“As far as I’m concerned, all four of us were trying to distract one another. It’s not like we singled Rob out, or anything,” said an elated Rose, who demolished Salley in the tournament final shortly following Dibble’s departure. “I guess I took it a little too far, especially when I gave him that atomic wedgie right in the middle of his eagle put on 17. But it’s not like it would have mattered; Dibbs was down by ten strokes.”

Dibble garnered the reputation for being a temper tantrum specialist during the course of a career that spanned eight seasons, five of which were spent frequently scuffling with Cincinnati manager Lou Piniella over the young flame-thrower’s rebellious behavior on the diamond. Thompson, a special BDSSP correspondent and close personal friend of Dibble, told SSNN that she has always known of the pitcher’s propensity for anger-fueled outbursts, but found herself pleasantly taken by his calm demeanor since the two began working together, back in 2006.

“I’ve never seen that side of Rob and, let me say, it wasn’t very pretty. All I was trying to do was flirt with Dibbs a bit, like I always do,” said the blonde bombshell, who may have born the harshest front of Dibble’s wrath. “The weirdest part was when Rob accused me of being a ‘no-good man eater,’ and cheating on him with some of the show’s production assistants. I didn’t even know we were dating. And if we were, after today’s debacle, the two of us would be so over.”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!