Cuban trying to reverse Kidd trade before Game Five

NEW ORLEANS, LA — A source within the Dallas Mavericks organization has confirmed that owner Mark Cuban is attempting to undo the much-ballyhooed trade for point guard Jason Kidd, “hopefully before tonight’s game.”

The Mavericks owner has apparently contacted New Jersey Nets management in an attempt to reclaim guard Devin Harris, who Cuban traded for Kidd. Cuban has also filed paperwork with Commissioner David Stern’s office in an attempt to undo the trade based on obscure rules violations.

“Basically, he thinks he got screwed,” said SSNN’s source, who demanded anonymity. “He really thinks the Nets pulled the wool over his eyes about Kidd.”

Cuban traded Harris, and several lesser players, for Kidd on February 19. Since the trade, the Mavericks finished the regular season winless against teams with a .500 record or better, and have lost three of the first four games in their first-round playoff series against the New Orleans Hornets.

During the series, Hornets point guard Chris Paul has clearly outplayed Kidd, scoring 21.1 points per game and dishing out 11.6 assists, while Kidd has averaged only 7.3 and 6.3, respectively. Now, with elimination looming, Cuban is trying to rid himself of what he calls “a human piece of driftwood.”

“Things have been pretty scary around here,” said SSNN’s source. “I think he’s on ‘roids or something. One minute he’s running around apologizing to everyone in the organization for the trade – including the secretaries and janitors. Next minute, he’s ranting and raving about how Rod Thorn and David Stern have conspired against him.”

While Stern and Cuban have had many public battles over the years, the NBA chief denies he’s trying to railroad the Mavericks out of the playoffs.

“Can I help it that he made a terrible trade? No. Was I happy about it? Absolutely. Did I dance the robot when I heard about the deal? No comment,” Stern said. “By the way, you know who would probably be the perfect guy to guard Chris Paul right now? Devin Harris! HA – take that, Cuban!”

When asked what legal basis Cuban may have for getting the trade overturned, Stern replied, “Absolutely none. Caveat emptor bitches, as they say. If that bloated blowhard can’t stand it, he should just get out of the league.”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!