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CHICAGO, IL — When Evan Johnson got an email on Sunday afternoon inviting him to the 2008 Bull Durham Fantasy Baseball League, the 28-year-old fantasy fanatic didn’t think twice about accepting.
“I was ridiculously excited,” Johnson said. “It’s a great group of guys, they’re all competitive and they all respond to your trade offers. Plus, no one had taken ‘Nuke LaLoosh’ as a team name, so I got it. Awesome.”
Unfortunately for Johnson, he failed to notice the league’s draft time – this Saturday at noon.
“I promised the wife a trip to IKEA Saturday morning, and she’s never done by noon,” Johnson explained. “I realized pretty quickly that I was screwed. Even if – by some miracle – she finishes early, we still have to drive back to civilization.”
For the past two days Johnson has been in intense negotiations with both his wife, Melissa, and the league’s commissioner, Jim Garner. While Garner is willing to move the draft time, he informed Johnson that it would cost him a first-round pick.
Melissa, on the other hand, is not willing to re-schedule the IKEA trip under any circumstances.
“There’s no way we’re not going to IKEA this Saturday,” Melissa told SSNN. “Evan made a promise, and he can either honor it or find a new wife. Besides, it’s not even a real game, it’s fantasy.”
Evan said that negotiations with his wife have been difficult because of her knowledge of pre-draft rankings. Apparently, Evan told Melissa about them when a handful of owners skipped his fantasy basketball draft, opting instead to use the default rankings to draft their team.
“I tried to explain that while it’s okay to skip your fantasy basketball draft, it’s sacrilege to miss a fantasy baseball draft,” Evan said. “You just don’t do that.”
But even this most persuasive of arguments did nothing to move Melissa’s hardened heart.
“Before, we were just going for curtains and maybe a new rug,” she said. “But now I have informed Evan that he should bring his credit card - we’re getting a new living room.”
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Labels: Bull Durham, fantasy baseball, fantasy basketball, IKEA, marriage, Nuke LaLoosh
Posted on March 12th, 2008
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