Local man “pretty sure” he’ll win fantasy baseball league

MANHATTAN, NY — Investment banker and avid fantasy baseball player Jason Ruffalo has told SSNN sources that he’s the team to beat this year in his fantasy league.

Ruffalo’s prediction is based on a recent calculation of some rough estimates of what he expects his players’ stats to be in the upcoming season, along with a “strong dose of gut instinct.”

“I was just messing around with some numbers,” Ruffalo said. “And I got to the end, and all I had left to put in was Pedro Martinez. So I put in my projected stats for him – 26-3, a 1.54 ERA and 247 strikeouts – and guess what? Looks like they’re gonna be toasting me at the banquet.”

Ruffalo said this is the third year in a row that he’s released his own projected stats. Each year his team has been projected to win.

“I had a lot of injuries a couple years ago, and last year I was really unlucky,” he assured SSNN. “Like, who knew that last year was gonna be the year that Randy Johnson dropped off?”

However, Ruffalo said that he’s found a way to refine his sytem somewhat. “This year, I have added a couple of new factors, and I feel like my numbers are much more accurate. Plus, I played a season on MLB 2008 with my team, and I have used those numbers as part of my calculations. So I certainly feel that, barring some sort of unforeseen consequence – like Jeff Kent hitting less than the 41 homers I have projected him for – I am in pretty good shape.”

Ironically, a lot of the players that Ruffalo had rated the highest did not garner much interest at all from his league-mates.

“Those guys are stupid,” Ruffalo said. “All they look at is age and recent numbers. They never factor in anything else, like experience. Todd Jones has been playing for like 20 years, so he knows how it works. You think a wily veteran like Jones can’t figure out a way to get 51 saves?”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!