Wife of Pats’ Seymour says husband not dirty, just “a little kinky”

FOXBORO, MA — Tonya Seymour, wife of Patriots defensive lineman Richard Seymour, today defended her husband against allegations that he’s a dirty player. “My husband is not a dirty player,” Tonya Seymour said. “He might be a little kinky, but he’s sure as hell not dirty.” Seymour has been dogged throughout his career by allegations that he’s a dirty player, many of which surfaced after he was fined for stepping on Colts lineman Tarik Glenn in a 2006 game. With the Patriots again in the Super Bowl, the allegations that Seymour will behave inappropriately have again resurfaced. “I mean, he’s curious, sure – but aren’t we all?” she continued. “He’s not into anything nasty; there are no bodily fluids involved, there is never any need for medical attention. At worst there might be a couple of other people in the room. Last time I checked, that’s not a crime, at least not in our house.” Giants center Shaun O’Hara was not willing to comment on the record about how Seymour’s kinkiness might affect the Super Bowl.

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!