Donovan stuck with subprime mortgage

GAINESVILLE, FL — SSNN learned late Thursday that Florida Gators basketball coach Billy Donovan is struggling under the weight of a “subprime” mortgage, whose payments are beginning to put a strain on the finances of the dapper coach.

“Like many Americans, I foolishly rushed into a home purchase that I could not afford,” a tearful Donovan told SSNN. “It seemed like a great offer at the time – the interest was so low! But then about six months ago, the ARM kicked in, and now my payments are out of control. Also, I bought the place when I thought I was going to be coaching the Magic.”

Donovan’s accountant – Ronald Silberstein of Boca Raton, Fla. – confirmed the coach’s tale of concern.

“Yes, Billy has put himself in a bad spot,” Silberstein told SSNN. “But there’s a lesson here. Never buy a $6 million home with zero percent down and a 40-year mortgage – I don’t care how many staircases it has.”

Donovan is not sure what his family is going to do. “We’re in a crunch,” he said. “I hate relying on the government for a bailout… But it seems like that may be our only option. I mean, this place is gonna end up costing us like $30 million by the time it is all said and done. I should’ve taken that job in Orlando.”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!