‘Cowboys cheerleader tells Jessica Simpson to ’step off’

DALLAS, TX — A Dallas Cowboys cheerleader is crying right now, but it’s for a totally different reason than T.O. Twenty-one year-old and two-year “Cowgirls” veteran Kandi Harris has publicly lashed out at Tony Romo’s “love” interest this week, claiming she was “romantically” involved with the Cowboys’ choke artist first, some six months ago.

“That Jessica Simpson stole my man,” Harris claimed Monday after signing autographs for underprivileged kids at a Dallas area shelter. “Tony and I were dating even before the season started. He said he wanted to be exclusive. I guess by ‘exclusive’ he meant porking some ditz who’s about as stiff as Jerry Jones’ face after a recent Botox injection.”

SSNN was in the Virgin Islands early Tuesday to get Romo’s response to the allegations as he was visibly still pouting over last Sunday’s 21-17 loss to the New York Giants in the NFC Divisional Playoffs. “Tony Romo doesn’t know what that girl is talking about,” Romo said while inexplicably referring to himself in the third-person. “Tony Romo doesn’t dip his pen in the company ink; you know what I’m saying. And that includes cheerleaders.”

While he may not be in the position to admit it, the emergence of a potential love triangle undoubtedly affected Romo’s performance in last week’s loss. Romo completed exactly 50 percent of his passes, for a meager 201 yards and pathetic passer rating of 64.7.

Meanwhile, on Tuesday, teammate Terrell Owens commented on the issue, inadvertently fanning the flames in an attempt to smother the fire. “I don’t give a damn who my quarterback snuggles up with, man,” Owens sobbed. “But when you attack Tony, you attack me. That’s my quarterback. Tony’s my quarterback. He could date the whole entire cheerleading squad for all I care.”

But Harris remains defiant on the idea of sharing Romo, who is undeniably becoming the Cowboys’ greatest playoff underachiever since Jackie Harris.

“That Simpson bitch needs to step off,” Harris shouted. “Super Bowl ring or no Super Bowl ring, Tony and I are going to be together.”

In an ironic twist to this story, SSNN has learned that Harris listed Simpson as her “favorite singer” on her personal profile posted on the Dallas Cowboys website.