LeBron reaches 9,000 points, women on same day

CLEVELAND, OH — LeBron James celebrated his 9,000^th point scored this week by also sleeping with his 9000^th woman. While it takes most high school-to-NBA players two to three years of experience to mature into NBA stars and ladies men, James has excelled from day one.

“Nobody scores more than LeBron, both on and off the court,” Cavs teammate Drew Gooden told SSNN. “At this point, there is nothing Lebron can’t do. The sky’s the limit for that cat.”

When James converted a first quarter free throw against Milwaukee on Monday night, he surpassed Kobe Bryant as the youngest player in NBA history to reach 9,000 career points. He currently leads the NBA in scoring with a 29.7 PPG average. James’ conquest of Kim Dawkins later that night beat all-time champion Wilt Chamberlain’s age by nearly two years.

“The kid’s got game, if you know what I’m saying,” former NBA great Charles Barkley said. “I don’t see any reason why he can’t break Wilt’s all-time record. If anybody can do it, it’s King James.”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!