FROM THE ARCHIVES: Vick beginnning to question friends’ loyalty, integrity

In retrospect, Vick was right to question his friends. And given the fact that he’ll be spending 20+ months in jail, I think it’s safe to say that “Guy’s Night” didn’t solve anything.

ATLANTA, GA — Embattled Falcons quarterback Michael Vick recently told a female confidante that he is beginning to have some doubts about the loyalty and general behavior of his friends. “Some things have happened recently that, you know, I don’t want to be a glass-is-half-empty guy, but it could be seen in some views like these guys were bad dudes who didn’t really have my back, maybe,” Vick reportedly told Shauna Jackson, 24, of Decatur, GA. Jackson said Vick declined to use specifics, but was clearly very troubled by the issues he was having with his friends, and was planning a “guys’ night” to mend the relationships. “You know, so much goes on when you get older, and start working, you know,” Vick said. “Well, actually those guys don’t work – but you know what I’m saying. I think it’s time to get back to our roots. A little Texas hold-’em with a $20 buy-in, a little Karate Kid… No problem that I have ever come across can’t be solved with a little Miyagi and no-limit action.”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!