Boozer’s wife keeps messing up checkbook

SALT LAKE CITY, UT — Carlos Boozer and his wife Cece have been arguing recently over some problems Cece is having keeping the couple’s checkbook clean and balanced.

“I like to keep a clean book, you feel me?” Boozer said when SSNN asked about his marital issues. “She’s always making mistakes and scratching things out. It looks like a Bic exploded on it.”

For years, Boozer has demanded that he be the one to manage the families finances, but recently he’s been giving Cece (who is pregnant with twins) more responsibility.

“I want to involve her in the offense more,” Boozer said. “But she’s always forgetting to carry the ten, and it causes all kinds of problems. The other day she completely air-balled on adding an ATM withdrawal. I mean, come on – that’s how you end up bouncing checks.”

Boozer said that being accurate with the checkbook is not always good enough. Presentation, as he put it, can be important – so the Jazz’s star power forward likes to have a clean document that is easily transferable between parties.

“To me, it’s always like, could I get a total stranger and have them look at this, and could they figure out what is going on?” Boozer explained. “At this rate, I can just forget about that.”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!