Schilling’s contract contains unusual incentives

BOSTON, MA — Curt Schilling’s incentive laden contract includes a two million dollar bonus if the burly pitcher will shut down his blog in time for the 2008 season, and an additional $5 million if the outspoken pitcher is willing to have his voicebox and vocal tubes surgically removed.

“We don’t think Schill is going to actually have his voicebox removed, unfortunately,” said Terry Francona. “So that’s a bummer. But the two mill to stop the blog, that should be a no-brainer.”

The pitcher’s blog, 38pitches.com, is his forum to interact with Boston’s faithful fans on a near-weekly basis throughout the season, taking his loyal readers on a turn-by-turn adventure of all things Schilling. The blog and Schilling’s undying commitment to his personal freedom of expression have been the source of much consternation for the Red Sox, who have time and again been called upon to react to things that Schilling has either written or said.

“I really hope he reconsiders the five million for the voicebox,” said Theo Epstein. “Five million is a lot of cash. You can do a lot with five million. I mean this guy is going to retire soon. That sort of money could really help him out.”

Schilling said – via his blog – that he was going to think things over and talk with wife Shonda before deciding what to do.

“We are trying to figure out what life without voice cords would be like for me,” Schilling wrote. “Communication seems to be the biggest obstacle. I mean, I would probably have to carry around a little chalkboard or something. It would be cumbersome, but I think it could work. Plus, don’t forget, I’ll still have this blog.”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!