Curry and Randolph eating contests force Knicks to remove locker room buffet

NEW YORK, NY — Intense eating contests between Knicks Center Eddy Curry and new acquisition Zach Randolph have forced team officials to remove a buffet table from the locker room. “I thought they were joking at first,” said Knicks forward, David Lee. “But everyday after practice, Zach and Eddie would sprint to the locker room and take bets on who could eat the most. Donuts, burritos, enchiladas, you name it. Those two will eat until they puke.” Knicks Head Coach Isaiah Thomas believes the removal of the buffet table should help both players keep the weight off. “You have to be tough with those two. I’m constantly catching them eating junk food in between water breaks and during time outs. If I had a dollar for every time I snatched a turkey leg from one of them on the bench, I could pay off Anucha Browne Sanders.” The addition of Randolph this summer potentially gives New York the strongest front court in the Eastern Conference. Only time will tell if the dynamic duo have the discipline to lead the Knicks to their first winning season since 2001.

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