Vick auction finds no takers for painting of dogs playing poker, attacking each other

ATLANTA, GA — Legal fees and a court order to pay back $20 million in bonuses have forced former Falcons quarterback Michael Vick to make most of his personal possessions available at auction. Last week, outside Vick’s Atlanta mansion, the public was given the opportunity to purchase an assortment of Vick-owned goods – “I got the Bentley!” screamed auction participant Dave Halgren. While auction goers snapped up virtually all of Vick’s personal items, one piece of merchandise was not sold – a giant painting that hung above Vick’s bed, depicting dogs playing poker while snapping at each other’s necks. “I thought about snatchin’ it up,” said customer Jake Chasen. “But it’s a little disturbing. Hit’s a little close to home, ya know?”  Still, the auction was a success according to Vick’s brother and auctioneer, Marcus. “We got some green for Mike out there today. He needs our help. I can’t believe the dog painting didn’t sell, though. Mike loved that piece. Always thought it was real classy.”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!